"Ah, yes." The old man peered through his glasses as he adjusted them. "I see."
Joe shivered and shifted on his feet. The parking lot was warm, but the mall was over-air-conditioned. He could feel his comically oversized nipples firm up under his crossed arms – and the eyes of passersby on his back. Of course the store had a glass front, he thought bitterly. Of course.
The old man turned to Anna, bemused. "When you came in earlier, I assumed the costume was for you," he chuckled.
"No, no," Anna said, looking over her shoulder at the gathering crowd. A few had taken out their phones. "This was a mistake. Definitely not what we wanted."
The old man paused and looked over at Joe. For an old guy, his eyes seemed... bright? Young? Joe shivered again, this time not entirely from the A.C. "Mistake?" the old man asked pointedly. "You know, in my line of work, I can't be the judgmental type... are you sure?"
"No," Joe said quickly. "It's a moo-" He paused, suppressing the moo. "... A mistake. Can you please fix this before my girlfriend has to milk me?" He dropped his arms in exasperation; his breasts and udder juggled uncomfortably. The pressure had only gotten worse in the trip over. God, Joe thought. What if I start leaking in the goddamn mall?
The old man kept his gaze for a moment before kneeling to look under the counter. Joe furtively peeked around the store. It was full of skimpy costumes and seemingly cheap toys. The crowd, bored, seemed to have dispersed, although at least a handful of them were curious enough to wander in the store – an older couple comparing a few of the costumes; a group of teenaged boys giggling about the wall of enormous dildos; a greasy-looking man in a superhero tee who was staring at... oh God, Joe realized with a start. He was staring at HIM.
"Aha! Here it is!" The old man leapt up from behind the counter. "This will fix everything."
In his hand was...