Lindsay slams her empty glass against the silver bar counter. “Damn, that’s great stuff!” She gazes over in Cuss’s direction. “Don’t feel drunk at all.”
Cuss snorts a laugh. “Nope, but you’ll probably end up lightheaded after this one. Your systems tend to get unstable after a couple of mutations.” Without looking,
he picks up the glass and sets it on the sink behind him. “Tell me if you feel dizzy after this next change. I’ll have to cut you off for a while if you do.”
“Really?” your right head asks.
“How?” you say.
“Come?” finishes your left self.
“Well, ladies,” he smirks, “too much of a good thing makes your cells unstable. Gotta give ‘em time to rest, make sure they stay in their new shape. Otherwise,
you’d end up a sticky glob of protoplasm on my nice clean floor. Takes days to get that out.”
Lindsay wobbles on her stool, grasping her head in her tentacles as the slick appendages slowly dry out. “So, whatever we become now is what we are, forever?”
Cuss shrugs. “Unless something else changes you again.”
Her teal complexion dries out over her entire body. She slowly develops the same pattern of teal scales that you wore only moments ago. “And we’ll never be
human again?” She strokes her scaly chin with an arm of six scaly tentacles.
“Nope. That’s gone for good.”
Lindsay grins impossibly wide, and you realize her mouth is growing out into a reptilian snout. “Good. I like thisss much better.” Her dark forked tongue flickers
from her serpentine mouth, darting between thin venomous fangs. “A Naganite. Lusssscioussss.”
Something strikes the three of you as odd. “Wait a minute,” Left You says.
“You didn’t have a snout when you were one of those…THINGS,” sneers Right You.
You grimace. “No, I didn’t. So why’s Lindsay changing that far?”
Lindsay eyes the barkeep with slitted snake orbs. “Yesss, Cussss,” she hisses. You see her forehead mouths changing into miniature snakes, the beginning of a nest
that grows from her bare scalp. “What’sss happening to me?” She seems to be getting taller every second.
Cuss looks suddenly away in terror. “Careful! You could turn me to stone if we make eye contact!” Two of you instinctively look away when he does; you take
control of your right hand to shove Right You out of Lindsay’s eyeshot. He fishes blindly in his apron, finally retrieving a pair of wraparound sunglasses. “Put these
on. It’ll protect everyone else. And for Orion’s sake, don’t look at yourself in the bar top!”
Lindsay grips them easily with her articulate back tentacles, both of which have become long serpents. Her arm tentacles hiss and writhe as they too become
snakes, biting the glasses to allow her a grip. She slips the wraparound silver shades on over her nest of vipers, turning her head to show off her look. All three of
you snicker, and she hisses a laugh in response.
Cuss takes a breath and wipes his forehead in relief. “Sorry, shoulda told you before. That last drink was from the Gorgonite guy over yonder. He asked me to
add a dash of his venom to it. That’s why you changed so far.”
Left You snaps your fingers. “Gorgonites reproduce by their venom!”
You nod. “You’ve got some action comin’, girl!”
Lindsay casually discards her useless dress as she twirls on the barstool. Your sensitive noses pick up the moist aroma of her twin vaginas as she sets her sights on
the sunglass-wearing male Gorgonite. He flicks a forked black tongue in her direction, sensuously lounging in his chair as his long tail glides slowly black and forth
against the floor. She provocatively licks her scaly lips with her black tongue, curling her legs around the shaft of the stool. They continue to wrap around the cold
metal as they draw together, lengthening and thickening into a strong serpent’s tail.
You roll your three pairs of eyes. “Well?”
The snake woman tastes the scent of the male in the air. Lindsay responds with a symphony of soft hisses. “You go have ssssome fun,” she hisses, coiling off of the
stool. “I’m gonna get me ssssome ssssex.” Wordlessly, she slithers toward the entranced male, hypnotizing him with every sinuous movement.
You all smile for her as she disappears upstairs with her new beau. Boredom settles in rapidly, and you tap your claws on the bar top as you sigh in triplicate.
“Well, what do we do now?” you muse to yourselves.
You shrug. Twice.