{{And for those who don't recognize it, our episode title is part of a famous quote by Carol Burnett.}}
Eric Anderson was surprised to see Kenya Adaeze at the diner, even if she was just looking for Nate. None of the Andersons had any idea where he was, but Eric was at least beginning to suspect a woman was involved. Sex was the only thing Nate ever skipped school for, but he didn't bother telling Kenya that. Nate and him had talked enough for Eric to know that his older brother was having girlfriend problems, but didn't pry. As long as Kenya wasn't pregnant, it was none of Eric's business.
Meanwhile, Eric, Spencer Lawson and her grandfather Mike listened quietly with their acute were senses as their friend Frieda Knight moved into the next booth to talk privately with her friends, who all happened to be the recently resigned household staff of the Knight family estate.
That there were so many of them didn't surprise Eric. Having been in Frieda's house once, he could just imagine how many people her parents employed to keep the place running.
But some of the things they said were quite shocking.
"One time, your mother actually accused me of stealing one of her ear rings," said an upstairs maid, "but it had slipped off her ear lobe and was stuck on her dress collar. I'm glad she found it, but I never did get an apology for the accusation. As if I would ever do such a thing."
"Your father is quite... particular when it comes to his automobiles," began the garage mechanic. "Once shipping on a replacement part for the Rolls was delayed in transit, and the man acted like it was all my fault. I heard complaints about how John the chauffeur had to drive your parents to some charity event in the town car instead for days afterward."
"Whenever I cook something new, even if it was at their request, that your parents didn't quite like after all," began Ethel the cook, "your mother would complain about how I obviously didn't follow the recipe properly. Don't get me wrong Miss Frieda, I like working for your family, per se, but as far as I know, your mother doesn't even know how to make toast. And if she ever found out I've been giving you cooking lessons..."
"I understand Ethel," said Frieda, sympathetically, when she was surprised that John the chauffeur sat down next to Ethel.
"I'll be honest with you Miss Frieda. I've had plenty of chances over the years to take other positions, but there's two reasons why I've stayed in your parents' employ. You're one, and she's the other," said John, while reaching out to grab Ethel's hand in his. "We're in love, and she's even accepted my marriage proposal," he revealed with a smile. "But if your parents found out we even had so much as a passing interest in each other, you can be sure that they'd fire at least one, if not both of us in an instant."
"I've suspected there might be something between you two for a while now," began Frieda, "but how long have..."
"After you started elementary school," confessed Ethel. "You're not the only one who gets lonely in that big house all day long when nobody's home, and work only keeps you occupied for so long in any given day," she said, while leaning against John.
"So if the two of you do decide to come back..." wondered Frieda.
"Your parents will have to accept us as man and wife. If we thought there was a chance you could attend, we would of invited you to the wedding. However, since neither of us have any other family, we're eloping to Seattle in the morning, spending the rest of the weekend there, and then coming back to Moon Lake Monday to see where things stand. The only reason we didn't leave today is because of your meeting this afternoon," revealed John.
"Really?" asked Frieda in disbelief, while trying to keep from crying. "I'm so happy for you both."
"Thank you," they said, almost in unison.
When all was said and done, the general consensus was the hassles of dealing with Benton and Amanda Knight as employers, how wonderful their daughter Frieda was, and how everyone would love to work for Frieda if she ever got her own house.
Frieda was hoping to "put the band back together" as she phrased it earlier that morning, but no one was willing to make such a commitment at that moment. It would depend upon what Benton Knight had to say to them when/if he did try to rehire them, versus their feelings toward Frieda. Despite how strong the latter was, it would be the former that their decisions were based upon.
"OKAY!" Frieda said, getting everyone's attention before they prepared to leave. "I'd like to once more take this opportunity to thank everyone for coming. I have everybody's contact information. Whatever happens, I wish you all the best, especially our impending newlyweds," she added, indicating Ethel and John, "and until we meet again, thank you all for everything. Growing up a Knight is not as glamorous as some people believe, but at least I had all of you there. Thanks," she said, not bothering to hold back her tears this time.
As the former employees began saying their final(?) goodbyes to Frieda and filing out of the diner, Mike Lawson turned to his granddaughter and said, "That back story you promised to tell me sometime must be a doozy. I'm glad I raised my son right," he added, before hugging Spencer.
"And apparently, there are chapters even we weren't aware of," said Spencer, after the hug was finished, to which her boyfriend Eric could only shake his head in agreement.
When it was just Eric, the Lawsons, and the diner employees, Frieda walked over to the cash register and asked, "How much do I owe you?", while reaching in her purse for the platinum credit card she showed the waitress earlier.
After handing her an itemized bill of some length, Frieda started going over it and asked, "Who else is here right now besides you, that other waitress that helped you out serving, and the cook?"
"Just the dishwasher. Why?" asked the waitress in return.
With that, Frieda grabbed a pen off the counter and started adding in tips for all of them at the end of the form.
When all was said and done, Frieda's diner party came close to $500, but she didn't care. Even if it was to be the last time, Frieda enjoyed seeing all her friends again.