You stare down at your huge red shod feet, and your motley colored costume. You have to find a mirror, but you already know you're a clown. The vampire steps on your foot as it approaches open fanged. TOOT! goes the horn in your shoe (at least you hope it's a horn). You instinctively squeeze the rubber bulb in your pocket and your flower boutonniere sprays water into the Count's open throat. He gasps and steps back.
"Ho-lee vater?" he asks in terror.
You shrug and dash inside the house. You see a hideous killer clown from outer space face glaring at you from the mirror. The vampire is at the door.
"You're not invited in here, Bat Man!" you laugh maniacally. Maybe you're part Joker? You pick up a butcher knife from a nearby table, and move toward the vampire. "As I recall, decapitation is as good for a vampire as a wooden stake through the heart!" you announce in a sing-songy voice, as you skip toward the door with the blade flashing in the light.
"Yust try, clownface!" challenges the vampire. Obviously, he never saw Killer Clowns From Outer Space.
His fangs are inches from your giggling head, but you're a very strong clown and hold him at bay with one hand while your other proceeds to saw through his neck with the blade. His head is a dusty old skull before it hits the porch and crumbles into dust. The skeleton stands there rotting in midair before it collapses into a dusty heap. You are disappointed too easy. You hear a werewolf howl. You smile more broadly, will a knife work on a werewolf or does it have to be silver or silver bullets? You plan to find out.
As you stand on the porch assessing your next move, the Frankenstein Monster Jack O'Lantern explodes into a seven foot appears.
You cackle, anything Doctor Frankenstein can assemble, I bet I can disassemble!" you have somehow acquired a plumber's wrench, and a screwdriver. You dash at the monster locking the wrench around one of his neck bolts. ZAP.
You get an electric shock and find yourself 30 feet away on the lawn as the monster removes the wrench from his neck bolt and the screwdriver from his nostril.
HONK, HONK. You runaway to kill another day, well, maybe later today. Mwahahahaha!