“What sorta ideas, Pa?” you say with a smirk.
“Ya know, I haven’t gone redneck in a long while. And if I’m really gonna be yer Pa, then I think I’m gonna have to make a few changes to, don’t you agree?”
“Oh fuck, can I do it? I can make ya a real good redneck, jus’ like I is!”
“Hey now, calm yer shit,” Jack said, “Yer a pretty new hand at this, ‘n slobbin’ up a mind can be a...tricky thing. Each round a the ointment don’t last forever, so nothin’s permanent, but let’s take it a bit slow.”
“It ain’t...ya mean I ain’t gonna be like this all the time?” you ask, looking back in the mirror, suddenly concerned about the possibility of being less filthy. “But I like who I is now!”
“Trust me, ya’ll be lookin’ like this fer quite a while--specially if ya avoid anythin’ that might rinse ya clean--showers, rain, that sorta shit. Hell, even soakin’ ja down in piss wears it away faster, if ya can believe it. Still, if yer ever gettin’ too clean fer our likin’, that’s when we just slob ya up all over again! That ointment never runs out--ya can be a whole different kinda slob a few years down the road. We just gotta make sure tah keep you nice ‘n dirty fer the next day or so, give the ointment time tah cure up all over ya. Good news is, the ointment always keeps ya good ‘n healthy, no matter how old, fat, filthy, ‘r depraved it might make ya.”
“Wait, old? That shit can make ya older?”
“Or younger--what, ya ain’t noticed? How old are ya, son?”
“18,” you answer automatically, but then second guess yourself. You’d been a bit older than that, hadn’t you? “Wait, ya made me a teenager?”
“Heh, barely legal--not that anybody’d know lookin’ at that mountain man body a yers.”
Ideas are racing through your head now, thinking about all the perverted, disgusting daddies you’d had sex with, wondering which one would make the sexiest daddy for Jack to become. “Look, daddy, I knows I’m still learnin’, but I gots a great idea.”
“Oh? Let’s make a deal then. You tell me what you want me tah be, we’ll slob up mah body tah yer specifications, ‘n then we can fuck up mah head tahgether.”
“Alright! Well Pa, what I want ya tah be is...”