You ever seen that movie? The one where that guy gets his face burned off and figures out to cover it up and get his revenge by wearing other people's faces? Well, this isn't that story, sadly. I'm not looking for revenge, and my face is perfectly intact. Yet something similar did happen to me once. It all started some time ago...
Jeff. Nice kid. One of the weirdest, to be sure. The guy put the nerd in "nerdy". He loved making references to his favorite movies and TV shows, often without being aware of the context into which he was putting them. For example, do we really need to know that one day apes will become super-intelligent and enslave us in the middle of a history lesson on the Congo? No, we didn't, but he said it anyway, and I kinda respected him for that. But this isn't about how awkward he was or how he learned how to act like a normal human. No, no, this story starts with a simple joke that, in my opinion, went too far.
It was lunch hour in the mess hall, and as usual, Jeff was sitting alone. Not that he ever cared, you know. He barely even seemed to notice the passage of time, sketching away in the little notebook that he always kept by his side. Most people weren't even aware he was there, and so they didn't bother him, but that wasn't the case with Jessie LaRoe and her clique. Poor Jeff wasn't looking when they switched the milk on his tray, and when he took a sip, he spat it out all over the table. It was sour. And the worst part was, the servers were already out of fresh milk, so he had nothing to drink but water. And he hated it.
I felt so sorry for him, that just before his next class, I secretly bought him a can of Magic Sizzle, the best cola-replacement substitute on the market (at least that's what the can said). When I went to bring it to him, I found him hard at work, drawing a picture of a girl. It took me a while, but then I realized who he was copying: Jessie LaRoe. And he wasn't just sketching her, he was making what looked to be very detailed notes on the shape of her face, her hair, and some other things that I didn't quite understand. Only when he noticed me did he hastily slap the cover on.
"What do you want?"
I gave him the soda, and I swear he blushed. No one had ever done something for this like him, I realized, because no one even noticed he existed. I decided to sit next to him for the period, so that he'd have someone to talk to. He was so excited, that without thinking, he invited me to come over to his house after school. I was nervous, but ultimately, I accepted.
His house was relatively small, but well-kept. He told me his parents frequently left for long trips overseas, so more often than not, he was alone. Because of that, he'd had to find distractions and hobbies, and that's why he loved movies and TV so much. So I asked if he wanted to show me a movie. He replied yes, he wanted to show me one of his favorites. So with open cans of Magic Sizzle (he'd grown quite fond of it), we watched it.
At the end, he asked me what I thought. I'll admit, the story didn't really stick with me, but I did appreciate how the main character tried to control his rage towards those who ruined his life, and how in the end, he choose to leave the woman he loved after realizing that he could never truly devote himself to her. It was, for lack of a better word, heartbreaking. The other thing I loved were the effects. I mean, holy cow, how were they able to make the faces look so realistic?
Jeff must have been thinking the same thing, because he then told me he had a surprise waiting in the basement that he wanted to show off. His basement turned out to be something out of a war movie, because it felt like walking into a solid bunker. So this is why the house seems so small, I thought.
The basement walls were lined with tables, covered with science equipment and tools, some of which looked like it needed dusting. It reminded me of the lab in that movie. Odd, right?
As he walked, Jeff became more and more animated. He told me that for the longest time, he had tried to figure out how to replicate the movie's effects. He'd used every material he could think of, but nothing had worked, and no matter how hard he scoured the Internet, he could find no instructions, fan pages, or anything on how to achieve his goals. But now that was about to change. He beckoned me towards a wall near the staircase, covered by a large tarp or cloth. When I got close, he whipped it off...
...and I gasped. Because hanging upon that wall were, I kid you not, dozens of faces!! And not just any faces, but FEMALE faces. They were all light-skinned, every face a unique work of art, but on closer inspection I realized who they looked like. I recognized kids I knew from school, teachers, even the principal. Our school was known in the district for being the only one to employ mostly women as staff, and I as far as I knew, only a few of the janitorial staff were men. Jeff was beaming with pride, as any artist would be displaying his newest creation.
He explained that after the longest time, he figured out what to do. It was an epiphany, he said, like someone up there wanted him to do this. But then I interrupted him. I mean, don't get me wrong, it was cool that he had all this to show me, but why? What purpose did it serve?
A smile began to crawl up on his lips. He disappeared, and then just as quickly reappeared, holding something in his hands, which he passed to me. It felt kinda slimy, and then I knew what it was: one of his faces. But this one looked familiar: was that...Jessie LaRoe!??
So that was why he was sketching her! I stopped myself and asked him why in the hell he handed this to me. His reply: "Put it on, Mary."
Suddenly, I found myself wanting to obey him, to do what he said. Maybe it was curiosity, maybe it was some mind-control shtick he was using, but the next thing I knew, I put Jessie's face over my own. Using my hands, I smoothed it down like I'd watched Neeson do, instinctively checking to make sure there were no creases or folds or anything that could make it obvious this wasn't my real face.
Jeff came back with a mirror. Looking at it, I realized that everything about me had changed. My face was slowly shifting, becoming smaller and rounder like Jessie's. My nose now had a broader bridge, and my lips were perkier. My hair was now a dirty blonde and full of tangles and waves, all the way down to my shoulders. And I felt my body changing too. My boobs were bigger, my body was completely hairless (the rumors were true, that girl really didn't have anything down there. She was smooth as a baby), and my butt was a little more prominent. If it wasn't for my less than fashionable clothes, I would be completely indistinguishable from Jessie.
Turning to Jeff, I asked him what to do now. To my shock, my voice came out high-pitchy and whiny, like Jessie's did. I could even talk like her!!
Jeff explained that ever since Jessie had pulled that horrible, nasty trick on him, he'd been thinking of ways to get back at her.
"This doesn't involve me kissing you and then posting it on FaceBook, right?"
Oh, no no, Jeff replied. He had something far more sophisticated in mind. Everyone knew what a bitch Jessie was, and everyone either feared her, loved her out of fear, or hated her. But what if one day, she treated people with compassion, understanding, and maybe even love? Would people think she'd lost her mind? Or that someone was pretending to be her? Or would they gradually accept that she had reflected on her wicked ways, and wanted to make up?
I didn't know the answer to any of these questions. But the more I thought about it, the more I concluded that he was right. Jessie needed to be cut down to size, before the real world hit her on the ass. And if that meant stealing her identity and getting everyone to think she'd been reborn as a kinder, gentler individual, then that was what I was going to do.
And who knows, if I can do it for her, maybe I can do it for all the other misunderstood women at school...