"I do have second thoughts, sometimes, about my appetite," Anija said, straining to keep his eyes focused on those of his Rider, Vaestro. Keeping sustained contact with anybody is never easy. Try it, sometime. "I will admit it," he continued, "I eat too fast, and I don't chew correctly. Vrackie has been worried about my health, though."
Vaestro just smiled at that. Confession was not just admitting to wrongdoing. This was a chance for mounts to talk about any thoughts or feelings at all, unburdening everything. Responsibility was borne by the Rider. A Rider either saw fit to punish his dragon...or didn't. He either counseled his dragon to behave differently...or didn't. He either laughed at an embarrassing thought...or didn't.
"I like watching birds, Rider," Anija said a little while later. "It's nice to do in the morning. It is peaceful."
"Eyes," Vaestro commanded, prompting Anija to quickly focus his eyes back on his Rider's eyes. "Anija, you seem to be evading something," Vaestro said firmly.
Pain filled Anija's eyes, and that pain cut Vaestro deeply. Ever since Anija's transformation into an angelic dragon, he had had incredibly soft, melancholic eyes. They were eyes that didn't judge, but instead, they did something more painful than judging. They asked you how you would judge yourself. They were a subtle part of Anija's magic. "Rider, I..." he attempted.
Vaestro kept his eyes gently focused on those of his dragon, watching as Anija broke down into open sobs. Something had really gotten to Anija. This was not like his foul-mouthed mount. Anija, angelic dragon or not, had always dealt with the world by flip remarks, colorful epithets, and occasionally some of the most imaginative cursing that Vaestro had ever heard. Seeing such raw emotions, right now, was leading Vaestro to wonder if his dragon could be seriously sick, and he was getting a little scared.
Eventually, the storm passed, and Anija kept saying he was very sorry, over and over. "I have really been very foolish, Rider, and I know you'll forgive me for being a very stupid drake," he said philosophically. "But imagine, me...in love with you. I have been very silly, haven't I?" He said, almost hopefully. He half-hoped and half-feared that this would pass with his Rider making jocular jokes and teasing him for being a very silly dragon, letting things continue as they always had.
"Well..." Vaestro started hesitantly. The truth was that, in all of the time that Anija had been a hen, he had always had a secret crush on his dragon. He had not stopped loving Anija when Anija had become a drake. He no longer followed Anija with his eyes as hungrily, true, but the bond between a Rider and his mount had remained strong and true, the depth of compassion between them never wavering. He took a breath, and with a sense that he might be doing something very foolish, here, he stuttered, "Ah-ah-ah..." It didn't come out right away.
Anija began to sense that something different than he expected was about to happen, and his attempts to laugh off the topic were blowing up in his face. He was scared. His heart raced.
"I miss you being a hen," Vaestro admitted lamely. Damn! That sounded stupid! Brutish and insensitive. How could Anija ever love him if he said stupid things like that? Internally, Vaestro was kicking himself repeatedly. Damn, stupid remarks.
Anija chuckled softly, though, as he realized that his Rider was getting just as awkward about this as he was. "You always were the only straight male in this crazy outfit," he said amusedly. "You poor straight boy, so alone," he teased.
"Well, I would love you, whether you were a hen, a herm, or a drake," Vaestro assured Anija. "I love you as a drake. I would only want you to change for you. It would break my heart if you changed yourself just for me. But...if you truly want me to fuck you, I'm going to need the right parts." He adopted a thick Brussels accent, and he quipped, "Nothing for gay, here."
"Well," Anija mused as he continued looking deeply into Vaestro's eyes. "I would miss many things about being a drake. It's really a lot of fun. But..." he started giggling. "Oh, I am being such a ridiculous dragon! I can change without any mana penalty, now, and without being stuck! Well, not that I would mind being stuck as a hen for five years THAT badly, but knowing that I can turn back quickly makes this a substantially easier decision."
Vaestro paused him there. "Wait. Is there something going on between you and Vrackie that you have not told me about? Are you not getting along, anymore? I believed you were monogamous?"
Anija cocked his head to the side humorously and kissed his Rider on his cheek. "We decided that Riders won't count against that," he assured Vaestro. "Besides, you will never keep up with a draconic libido. I don't see how Luka keeps up with Karyu as well as she does. She must be sore constantly!"
Vaestro snuggled his beautiful angelic dragon, then, as the dragon sparkled and began to change.