Tanner gave the Chronivac a good shake as he grasped it awkwardly in a pudgy fist. He listened but the device disappointed and made no rattling noises. Bored, he dropped the device as the funny feelings faded.
Derrick found him, on his back with his feet in the air, trying to reach for the toes at the end of his pudgy legs. The toddler giggled at the toes that seemed out of reach.
"What's got into you?" Derrick asked and reached for the Chronivac. He scanned the profile.
Name: Tanner William McBeall
Physical Age: 2
Mental Age: 2
Ethnicity: Caucasian
Height: 3’ 2’’
Weight: 27 lbs
Sexual Preference: N/A
Hair color: black
Eye color: blue-green
Occupation: toddler
"Everything looks the same as last time... hey, wait a minute." He looked toward the top of the traits listed in the profile. "Oh, that's different."
Beneath his brother's physical age, Derrick spied the new line for mental age. The lines read "2" for both.
Tanner babbled and reached out a hand attached to a stubby arm. "Dewwick!" Tanner exclaimed with immature glee.
Derrick frowned. "I guess I'd better fix that." He punched at the controls, but they remained locked down.
"Maybe I can bring up my profile..."
A moment later, he succeeded. On the screen, he read over his current traits.
Name: Derrick Jacob McBeall
Age: 20
Ethnicity: Caucasian
Height: 6’ 5’’
Weight: 211 lbs
Sexual Preference: N/A
Hair color: brown
Eye color: blue
Occupation: much older brother
He tried to make a change to eye color, to see if the system might be responsive, but he got the same warning Tanner had received earlier.
"No, you worthless piece..."
Suddenly, Derrick felt funny as the malfunctioning unit tried to salvage the situation. He shook his head and glanced through the profile. Despite changes to his age, occupation and eye color, he considered everything normal.
Name: Derrick Jacob McBeall
Physical Age: 30
Mental Age: 30
Ethnicity: Caucasian
Height: 6’ 5’’
Weight: 211 lbs
Sexual Preference: N/A
Hair color: brown
Eye color: green
Occupation: Father
Suddenly he felt a pudgy fist close around his thumb. He looked down at his son.
"What is it Tanner?" Derrick asked, suddenly awash with paternal instincts.
Tanner just wanted daddy's attention. He tried to form his name. "Dad-E."
Derrick read his son's profile on the device.
Name: Tanner William McBeall
Physical Age: 2
Mental Age: 2
Ethnicity: Caucasian
Height: 3’ 2’’
Weight: 27 lbs
Sexual Preference: N/A
Hair color: black
Eye color: blue-green
Occupation: Son
He particularly liked the last line of Tanner's profile that identified the cute toddler as his son. He was immensely proud to be the father of such a smart, handsome little boy.
"Sounds right to me, so why am I holding on to this piece of crap?"
He dislodged his thumb from Tanner's grasp, picked up the toddler in his arms, and then walked to the kitchen, where he placed the Chronivac in the garbage with other items no longer needed and ready to be discarded.
An odd look of distress entered the toddler's eyes as his daddy threw away the shiny object, but then daddy lifted his shirt and blew a raspberry on the boy's tummy. Tanner squealed with delight and all was right with the world.