"Sooey! Here, Pig!" shouts a voice behind you. You snort, you're not a pig, but the pig-call seems to beg you to answer and reluctantly you walk toward the voice.
You round the bend and stop in surprise to see a character taken from Lil Abner standing at least 6'6" barefoot and wearing coveralls with one loose strap is the most handsome muscle man you've ever seen. He raises his hands to call "Sooey" again. He lowers his hands and places them on his hip when he sees you.
"So there you are, pig. I've been looking all over for you!" He marches toward you.
"There's been a mistake--oink!" you say as he grabs you around the waist and carries you with one arm wrapped around your waist. With his free hand he begins to strip off your clothing. He discards your clothes as he carries you away.
"Stop that!" you protest.
"Quiet, piggy. Once you're properly naked, we'll grease you up for the contest."
"Contest?"
"I said be quiet, pig!" the hill billy orders giving you a rib bruising squeeze with his powerful arm. There is a ripping sound and your white briefs now adorn a tree branch like a flag of surrender.
You dangle sullenly from the giant's arm as he walks down the muddy dirt road to whereever the "contest" will be held.