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Pillsbury Sez It Best

added by quiggman 21 years ago

As a jumped from the hot greased pan, I landed on my feet. My body squashed down, then jerked back to original height. I was now much smaller than the grown girl,
who stared at me with malevolence in her eyes. Peering onto the shiny side of a toaster on the counter on which I stood, I was totally taken aback. I was now the
spitting image of the Pillsbury dough boy. The grown girl poked her middle finger deep into my very pliable body. "Damn it! That hurts," I screamed. "Laugh when I
poke you -- or ELSE!" the grown girl demanded as she balled her right hand into a fist. I grinned sheepishly. As the snide smile return to the grown girl's face, she
undid her fist. She poked me again, this time so deep you could feel her sharp fingernail emerging from my ass. "Hehehehehehehe," I said while hurting on the inside.

The grown girl turned around and produced a rolling pin. "I grow tired of you in your current form. Let's see how you look and act when rolled flat," she said. Flicking
me backward onto a wooden board liberally coated with flour, she dropped the rolling pin on me. "Eeeeyow!" I cried as the kitchen implement was rolled backward
and forward on me until I was but an inch thick. Painfully pulling myself up from the board, I tried to move as before, but I was hard. My flattened body found it
impossible to move forward without twisting my body in strange archs. I would have chosen to stay put, except that the grown girl was now sporting a chef's knife.

Not wishing to be dismembered, I learned to move quickly in the shortest amount of time ever. A trudged painfully toward the edge of the counter as the nasty grown
girl dropped coffee beans into a Salad Shooter. The partially chopped beans flew from the nozzle at rapid speed, poking holes in my doughy body. Now I knew how
Fearless Fosdick felt! As the monstrous grown girl laughed unmercifully, I reached the edge of the counter and jumped. I fell...


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