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Animalia Ambassadoria: Quick News

added by makutamon 2 years ago O

"Hello everyone and welcome to a new episode of Animalia Ambassadoria." said Miles, starting the latest episode. "This episode is going to be a little shorter than usual due to the fact that we're all getting ready for finals, as well as some other things that are going to be going on this summer, so we're going to have five pieces of news from Animalia and it's colonies in this order: fast, cool, big, weird, and funny."

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"In Fast News, one group of donations were from Greyhound Racing, and while they were little to no problems uplifting them, their first order of business was, and still is, getting themselves new names." said Miles bringing up the clip, "But afterward, they have begun training for the Track and Field events of the upcoming IAC. However, the way dogs do racing compared to how humans do track and field is causing a few... problems." In the clip, one of the greyhounds (who was clearly female) was doing hurdles and managed to jump over the first three no problem. However the fourth hurdle clipped her knee causing her to do a rather painful-looking faceplant into the track, much to the wincing reactions of those who were watching, though there were some that still found it funny.

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"In Cool news, Claw Coliseum has begun its summer "swim time" program for helping people and/or Animalians stay cool." Miles said after a brief commercial break, getting the clips ready, "Unfortunately, lust can make guys and/or girls do crazy things they regret afterward, as you're about to see." Then Miles started playing the clips of guys and girls doing silly stuff in the pool to try to win an Animalian's attention, with one of the best (or worst, depending on your definition) was a girl doing a dive off the high dive platform, but misjudging the platform's length, taking a few too many steps, and ending up belly flopping into the water while flailing her arms and legs.

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In Big news, we're having an interview with "Rock", who became a bull Animalian to deal with his recurring Leukemia, but ended up quite different from the other Bull Animalians." said Miles, bringing up Jen-Jen and Ashley's interview with "Rock", his struggles with Leukemia, and how life was treating him now that he was technically a "naked bull". While he was clothed normally for a bull Animalian, his pink, human-like skin and thin hair helped him stand out from other bulls, and the scientists who had supervised him had a theory that it was due to his chemotherapy treatment that made him "naked". Though that was still a theory, so they needed more tests to prove it.

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In Weird news, Animalia was approached by some unusual organizations." said Miles, "Though they weren't really any 'bad' ones, they were still unusual. One was a representative of the Church of the Lord Jesus Christ, which is based in West Virginia. It is one of those that believe that Christians must handle poisonous snakes in order to test their faith, and thus were interested in Animalia's snake members. The other was from a Christian midwifery service that doesn't use things like modern health and science to deliver babies. While both were tolerated by both the PR-MD offices, it was made clear to both organizations that Animalians weren't interested in either joining a new faith or using them to deliver their babies, so we're good for now."

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Finally, in Weird News, Madame Juliet "Silver Fox" Renard-Argente has brought several girls suffering from mental deficiencies to learn more about how the Animalia Virus affects those with mental disorders/mental illness. The first two, Fifi and Mia, became a skunk and cat Animalian, respectively, and two more have just become a milk cow Animalian and a rabbit Animalian. Madame Juliet's hope is that the process will help them grow out of wanting to be nothing higher than sexy French maids that were so often stereotyped in popular media, and so far the answer to whether or not the virus is helping them is (Eddy: "What's the word Double D?" Edd: "Inconclusive, Eddy."). While they are a little faster on the uptake than they were before, it's still too soon for anything to be determined for certain.

Another weird thing is that apparently, France's government want their colony, with Madame Juliet's vineyard as part of it, as something similar to Lyre/Animalia, which includes a strip club and Casino. Though I don't know myself on France's policies for such things, it was more... "okay" to do so in Lyre since it was technically a cool-down-town only a day's journey from Las Vegas."

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"Before we leave, the Meat Market is going to be having a special, "Arabian Night" event, but it's "Invitation Only" so not everyone's going to be getting in. Also, it's one of the few events that is NOT going to be covered by Animalia Ambassadoria, so you can't watch it on the website, whether you're a free or premium member." Finished Miles, "But until next time, see ya."


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