One Month Later...
“On the bright side-“
Sofia cut her off with a remark that was almost screeched. “The bright side? What fucking bright side is there?!”
Rhonda rolled her eyes. “-it wasn’t our fault this time.”
The advance warning SALEM had issued was about the only reason St. Chariot’s hadn’t become another nexus for a now-worldwide orgy. Even then, the fast-spreading cloud of pink gas had only been narrowly averted. The principle had wisely decided that trying to barricade themselves against such a powerful force of corruption was foolish - instead, she and the rest of the faculty had decided to relocate... not to anywhere on Earth, but to upper orbit over a world that was hard to recognize, considering the oceans were pink and the land was mostly gold.
The school itself was fine, well past where the atmosphere of the planet effectively ended, and protected by innumerable wards and barriers. They weren’t alone, either, having been joined by various spacecraft that were at a high enough orbit when the cloud began its unstoppable spread... and in the past few days, by goddamn aliens. Apparently, some wormhole-generating device under Cheyenne Mountain had allowed some bimbos to escape to another planet - one that ultimately had to be glassed, compelling the aliens to come to Earth and prepare to bomb it into oblivion.
Which was a bit concerning.
“You think it’s gonna go anywhere?” Rhonda asked as she glanced over to the flagship of the alien race, a massive, angry, sleek beast of annihilation. Hexe had traveled aboard in order to negotiate with the velociraptor-esque creatures (well, they were reptilian, not avian, but they still looked like the snappy lizard predators from a certain movie franchise in Rhonda’s eyes), hoping to secure a chance to try and fix the planet before they reduced it to an uninhabitable rock. In response, Sofia merely shrugged.
“Doubt it. I hear they’re pretty pissed off about the whole thing.”
“Yeah, guess being forced to glass a planet does that to you.” She sighed loudly. The draconic girl wanted to have hope, but... this was bad. Way worse than even the mermaid thing a few months back. It didn’t seem like there was any way to fix this - deep down, she wasn’t even sure an orbital bombardment could fix the problem. This had been one of those things where everything that could go wrong was going wrong, in an increasingly spectacular fashion.
As they sat at the edge of the floating rock holding the school, just about to hurl another pebble down at the planet below, both girls suddenly felt a chill wash over them. This was followed by a shared scream of confusion before they were suddenly falling - about five feet, down to slam into the floor of the principal’s office. They both groaned, dragon tails wagging in pain, before their attention was drawn to a very haggard-looking Mala Hexe standing behind her desk. The bottle of mystical whiskey in her hand wasn’t exactly an encouraging sign.
“I need your help,” she stated flatly, not even bothering to apologize for the surprise teleport. “We’ve come to a settlement with the Valkarians. You two have the greatest penchant for fixing these situations - you will do so again for me. For all of us.”
Terrific. Off to save everyone yet again. Rhonda signed as she stood up, stretching her wings and holding out a tail to help Sofia to her jello feet. “Yeah, that figures. What exactly have we gotta do to save the planet this time?”