"Hello everyone, and welcome to a new episode of Animalia Ambassadoria." Said Sarah, "We're out of school for now and decided to do a 'Reunion' episode today."
"Now let's get started with some of the funniest things that have happened during the IAC." said Malice, queueing up the clips.
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"We all know that the French are getting started on their new Animalia colony, but we've recently sent them a list of 'infrastructure' for the colony that is making the European Union reconsider having a colony in every nation." said Sarah, "Mainly due to the cost of building a gym/arena for training and fighting, a 'Brumation House' for reptile Animalians, and similar things." At that, there was a clip of a number of increasingly larger groups of people facepalming. "Fortunately, this managed to allow France enough time to work on said Infrastructure without too much outside interference, much to Miss Juliet's relief."
"Speaking of Miss Juliet, she's currently seeing someone who's officially part of Mercy's "Criminal Trash Recycling" program." said Malice. "While officially the program can't accept drug kingpins, the one Miss Juliet is seeing is a drug kingpin, but only because he's well over 500 lbs. in weight and only turned to the drug trade to afford his medical bills. While his identity has been withdrawn to protect his identity, he has been unofficially named the the "Breaking Bed Kingpin", both because of his weight and as a reference to popular TV show Breaking Bad."
"But what was really unexpected, at least in some ways, was how both he and Miss Juliet match, especially since he certainly is 'kind and smart, educated and an educator'." said Sarah, getting ready for the next part of the episode.
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"It's no secret that the things that the IAC use for events like Track and Field are much larger and heavier than what humans use." Said Sarah, getting the clips up. "But we use softer, safer, versions so something like this doesn't happen." Then it showed a clip of Olympe throwing a shotput, but due to her relative inexperience, the throw was a little off and... and it immediately switched to a clip from You're the Greatest, Charlie Brown where the shotput Charlie Brown throws lands right behind Woodstock, giving him the scare of his life.
"Don't worry, no one got hurt." reassured Malice, "It was just a bit of a scare, and we use alarm sirens to let people know to get clear when someone's about to throw things."
"We also use extra reinforced, specially weighted hurdles for both established events as well as a few new ones, such as the Sprint Hurdles." Said Sarah, setting the clip up. "Unfortunately, for those who aren't used to them, this can lead to some painfully hilarious moments." The clip showed a star track and field athlete from out of town being allowed to try one of Claw Coliseum's hurdles courses out. He did alright with the first two-thirds of the course, but it was during the final third that his jump over the hurdles came up short and he landed on it split-legged, much to his surprise and pain.
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"Probably what the biggest thing that's officially going on during the IAC is the Martial Arts Tournament and Showcase, which was 'reassigned' to Heiya Island." said Sarah.
"We also know that a large number of old coins were found on the island." said Malice, setting up the link to the article that covered the discovery. "While both the Chinese and Japanese governments are still arguing over how to divide the resulting money, they've decided to show some of the newly cleaned coins like a museum exhibit, fortunately with Heiya Island's 'samurai police' watching over them."
"Speaking of samurai," said Sarah, "Animalia recently had a number of Japanese warhorses join Animalia, and attracted the attention of Archeron IV, or Archy, and his group. Fortunately, this didn't result in a kind of rivalry. Instead, since samurai and knights are surprisingly similar, Archy and his group are traveling to Heiya Island not only to show the similarities between European knights and Japanese Samurai, but also to showcase armor crafting, especially since samurai armor is a lot lighter than expected."
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"And that's all the time we have for today." said Sarah, finishing up the episode, "Be sure to watch our biggest event, our 'comparison' of Amateur Animalian Athletes against Olympic Athletes, and the official IAC Tournament. Until then, see you all next time in the Wilds of Animalia."