This entire mess was confusing as hell, and in that miasma of bewilderment, there were two things that she could anchor onto. One: Kate was a diehard pilot, and more than anything, Jane wanted to stick around with her, basking in this sudden attraction they were sharing for as long as possible. And two: there was no way in hell that she was about to go and join up with a bunch of alcoholic sailors and crayon-munching jarheads. "You get the hell out," she growled at Johnson, "If you weirdos want to recruit me, you'll have to fight your way through the entire United States Goddamn Air Force!"
A smug look crossed Hetzer's face as Johnson sighed, shrugging and giving a disappointed shake of her head before turning to shove past Park and out the door. Wellbury was hot on her heels, looking stoic as ever, but Ramirez lingered, giving the half-fighter woman a wink and making a little 'call me' motion with one hand. Jane didn't even try and hide her expression of disgust at the very concept of anything vaguely sexual involving a Marine, but that hardly seemed to dissuade her from continuing to stare at Jane's plate-tits until she'd left the building, and Park had locked the door to give all four some privacy.
Hetzer's shoulders relaxed as both colonels took seats, Jane and Kate following suit. "You had me worried there for a moment, Evans. Glad to see that this transformation hasn't affected your sense of branch loyalty." She glanced over to the half-naked Kate. "I'm sorry to interrupt your... fraternization... but it seems like I showed up just in the nick of time. Those bloody fetishists would've hounded you relentlessly."
"Riiiiight." Was this about the weird latex undersuits? Those had been bizarre, but... you know what, not even something Jane wanted to get into. "I'm guessing... you're here to drag me off to some lab to dissect, right?" She winced, holding Kate's hand in her own a bit tighter. "Colonel, I know I'm basically Air Force property, but... I'd really rather not get cut open like a frog in a biology class."
Hetzer let out a hearty laugh. "Lieutenant Evans, if anyone tries to cut you open, I'll have them court-martialed and exiled offworld." Jane very, very badly wanted to pause the older woman right there and demand to know what the fuck she meant by 'offworld', but Hetzer continued right on speaking, giving her no opportunity to do so. "You see, I have a pretty good idea of what happened. Based on what you told Colonel Park, I believe these dog tags-" She reached into her pocket, taking out a sealed plastic bag containing the tags in question. "-are a bona fide wish-granting magical artifact. You have no idea how long the USAF has been trying to get their hands on one of these without those army witch bastards finding out."
"Army... Witch?"
"SALEM. Army's little gaggle of magic users." The way she casually brought up magic users threatened to give Jane a headache - it was becoming rapidly obvious that a much more fantastical world than anything she'd imagined had been going on under all their noses. "They consider themselves the authority on all things magic, and they always rush to secure any artifacts like this. I've kept them in the dark so far, but they'll find out eventually... and before that happens, we need to make use of this."
She tossed the tags out onto a table between the intensely-staring Park, and an equally intrigued Kate. "If I had my way, we'd be using this thing to turn every single man and woman in the Air Force into magical human-fighter superairmen, just like you. But that'll never go over, so instead..." She darted her eyes between the Korean colonel adn the near-nude pilot. "I need volunteers. Reliable people with good records, willing to spend the rest of their lives with the same condition as Evans here, and serve your country as the most elite aerial forces the world has ever seen." Her eyebrows raised. "I'm sure I can find others if you're not certain... but do either of you really want to let this pass you by?"