The decision of what transformation the world would fall under came to two gods in particular, the siblings Gork and Mork. They’d taken a break from brawling each other just for this purpose, and knew exactly what to turn the humans into.
“We’s gonna turn the humans into greenskins,” Gork said, “They’s gonna be a brutal brace of Orcs who all love fighting and honorable war. They’s all gonna be boys, naturally, and they’re gonna grow from the earth itself like mushrooms.”
“Like mushrooms?” Mork said, exasperated, “That’s no fun! I rather like sexual reproduction meself. Much more cunning and smart. They should all be a cunning collection of Orcs who love scheming and honorable espionage. They’s should all be hermaphrodites like me, see, and they’re all gonna be built all Amazonian and sexy-like with hourglass figures and sculpted muscle.”
“Right then, how about this?” Gork suggested, “We do both at the same time. Both buff and burly boys and hermaphrodites who are all either more brutal than cunning, or more cunning than brutal.”
“I never liked compromise with you,” Mork replied, “but this time I think I do. Of course, we still have to figure out which one of us is the best god. Shall we continue our battle?”
With that, the twins Gork and Mork resumed their battle as the virus they made descended to the planet below. Soon, everyone on Earth would become a greenskin, and a new age of constant honorable combat would commence.