The idea that I now wielded unlimited cosmic power on my ring finger was intoxicating. I began to grow more and more excited – and nervous! - of what I could do. My eyes darted around as I looked at the gothy counter girl, the millennial dude who was now on his laptop writing, the strange possibly homeless lady, my new ring, and occasionally my coffee.
What would I do?! What did I want to do?
I quickly took out my phone and my eyes widened as I saw the myBank app sitting there. I opened it, checked my balance, and my stomach began to cartwheel.
“I... wish I was a millionaire.” I whispered oh so quietly.
Suddenly, my bank balance jumped from about $400 to over a million dollars. I gasped, put my hand to my mouth in shock, and felt like my bulging eyes might eject from my skull.
“I wish I was a multi-billionaire.” I whispered again, watching the numbers in my account jump to absurd heights. I sat shaking, startled, and glanced around the coffee shop like I had done something pure evil. Nobody noticed or cared. I waited for the cops to come arrest me. I waited for the bank to call and tell me my account had been frozen. Nothing happened! I kept checking the numbers and kept wishing them to become higher and higher. Eventually, I decided to level off at about 100 billion dollars and called it a day.
I sipped my coffee meekly, white as a sheet, and pondered if I should bother going to work tomorrow. Suddenly, my phone rang and I jumped. I raised it, breathing heavy, and saw it was just my sister Angela.
“Hey, sis,” I said shakily.
“Hey, baby brother.” The voice on the other end said with complete normalcy. “I was thinking of going out to the farm this weekend to visit the folks. You wanna come?”
“Oh, uh, I guess I can.” I shrugged, as if she could see.
“Hmm. Okay. You okay, Joey? You sound... off.”
“Just... uh, well, I might be coming into some money soon. Like a lot.”
“What?!” Angela said excitedly. I could practically hear her bouncing on the other end. “Hey, that’s great news! New job?”
“Uh... good investments.” I lied, trying to think of a good reason why I would have suddenly become one of the richest guys in the world. “Something big is about to pay off, I think.”
“I didn’t know you were into the markets, J. That’s so cool! I hope it works out for you.”
“Uh, me too.” I gulped. “Just watching some numbers go up and I’m really excited.”
“Hey, well, good luck! I’ll see your Saturday then?”
“Yeah, sure, Angie!”
“Take care, baby bro. Love you.”
“Love you too, sis.”
I sat there in shock, checked my balance again, finding it... absurd. I even checked the transactions and saw they were the same as they had been at the start of the week. No massive influxes of magical money or anything like that. I had kind of wish-hacked my bank account.
I looked around the coffee shop again and blinked several times. Hey, what else could I do?