Trog sat in the office in the HR department. Sebastian had tons of things going on, so having access to a building a short walk away was convenient for him. He was nervous. He’d been a bit too good at inserting himself into the system. People knew him, now, like he’d worked there informally and was now just making it official.
“You know, it’s really nice that someone so active in our community would agree to work security part-time.” The pretty young elf HR lady, Belinda, said. “I really loved your performance as Pa in Little Keep on the Borderlands.”
“Yes, well,” The old bugbear scratched the last patch of hair on the top of his head, not noticing it recede into smooth, bald pate and chuckled. “It was quite the role, wasn’t it?”
“Oh, don’t be modest. Candy?”
“I shouldn’t, on a diet.” Trog took the candy anyways and adjusted his Polo to keep it from sliding up and exposing his soft belly.
“Now, normally there is a physical test, but you look strong. Can you sit for four hours at the gate? It’s not strenuous.”
“Of course.”
“Alright, let me print off the documents you need to sign and -oh!” Belinda stared as her screen began to distort.
Trog raised a brow. “Something wrong?”
“I just…” Belinda tapped a few times on her keyboard. “I…I don’t know! It’s not responding!”
“Oh. Did you install Windoors 14?” Trog had no idea if that was a valid reason for a system crash.
“I need to call IT.” There was a beep from her phone. “Oh, and Sebastian is trying to contact you. When you leave, turn on your earpiece and call him back.”
Trog nodded, wondering what whacky and zany changes his actions wrought upon reality now. Would Sebastian be aware of who he was? Was he walking out into a fight? He sighed and maintained zen within himself, as Tanaka had taught him. Reality was a matter of perspective. The old bugbear hoisted himself up and walked outside, turning on his earpiece.
He heard Todd’s emergency beeps.
Ah. So the gorgons had given them trouble. Trog hummed and tapped his earpiece twice. He was on his way.
“Trog? Can you meet me at the Hedge Maze? I’m afraid we have a bit of a problem.” Sebastian’s voice cut into his ear.
“Yes, of course. Be there in five.”
“Take the cart.”
Things were working out after all, it seemed. Maybe Xarxos was right.
-=-=-=-=--=-=-=-=-==-=-=-=-=-==-
Half an hour ago…
Xarxos caught the slumbering Minotaur before he could hit the ground and set him gently behind a large bush. The entire area was trapped. The longer he was in the Maze, the more familiar with it he became. Part and parcel of being an actual Minotaur.
He was exhausted. He’d needed to use most of his energy taking out the highly resistant Minotaurs. He’d looted their bodies a piece at a time. Though he now wore the same uniform as they did-loincloth, battleaxe, arm bands-the gorgons were still pursuing him. There were three. Not one, as RK had implied in his message. All three gorgon sisters were here.
All could turn him to stone, but he wasn’t sure that was all they could do. He’d seen statues that were not based on any myths he knew. A deer centaur with an anthropomorphic cervine head and torso wielding a bow attached mid-back as though it were riding it, the deer head in the front having huge sweeping antlers and a mouth filled with sharp teeth. A pile of pythons writhing together with all heads and no tails, wrapped in a ball of lust, reptilian cocks stuffed in orifices.
Xarxos entered a small clearing with a fountain, the statue on top that of a short, fat satyr. The satyr’s head was thrown back, mouth stuck in a rictus of pure ecstasy and hand frozen mid pump on a huge, erect cock. Water spurted out the tip into the basin below in steady intervals, perpetually stuck in the throes of an intense orgasm.
The satyr’s features seemed oddly familiar to Xarxos, but he couldn’t tell why. Probably a poor trespasser into the Hedge Maze like him. He shook his head. There would be time enough after the fight with Sebastian to fix all the victims in here. And it looked like some of them might not be fixable without Arcane’s dispel magic spell.
Todd should have made it out by now. He knew the directions he gave might be a bit confusing, but he was sure he’d bought him enough time. It was mostly just right turns anyways. Trog paused as his hoof squished into the wet grass.
The grass was flooded with water. Shards of concrete were still lying on the grass here and there. A tubular form had flattened the grass around the fountain. Judging from the clues, Xarxos deduced that a gorgon had been through here, likely chasing after Todd. Damaged the fountain in a frenzy to get to him.
A hiss nearby alerted him of a gorgon. They could taste the air with their snake-like tongues He bet they could taste him. Xarxos ducked behind the fountain and waited.
The gorgon that entered the clearing was not Medusa, but one of her less-famous sisters. On her back was a quiver of arrows and in her hand was a bow, arrow strung and ready to loose. Xarxos kept his eyes on the ground, watching the gorgon’s lower torso writhe and wriggle towards the fountain.
He held his breath.
The gorgon eyed the statue on the fountain.
“Not lewd enough.” She hissed.
She reached out and took the satyr's remaining arm in her grasp and shifted it to grasp one of the statue’s meaty nipples, pinching it and adjusting the arm. She eyed her work critically with her slitted eyes, nodded, then turned to leave.
Xarxos’ heavily muscled arm wrapped around her neck. The gorgon gasped, tried to shriek, snake tail writhing, hair biting at his arm, but Xarxos flexed. The gorgon went limp,bow slipping from her hand.
He held the sleeper hold for a few more seconds and then lowered her to the ground. Careful not to look at her face, he relieved her of her bow and arrows. It was a large compound bow, made of driftwood that wound around emeralds. The arrows were huge, easily capable of taking out a rogue Minotaur employee. A normal human being could never hope to draw the bow, but Xarxos was not human.
Golden motes of light floated off the prone form. Xarxos watched as the gorgon disintegrated in sparkling motes of dust. Nothing remained where she lay a few moments ago. She’d been unsummoned.
Small wonder none of his spells had worked on her. Xarxos didn’t want to kill anyone. But summons weren’t alive, they had fixed forms that no reality shift could change. And ‘killing’ them did not violate Xarxos’ morality.
He had taken too long in this Maze. Xarxos needed to move, get to the Tower. The faster he got Sophia out, the sooner Trog could go all-out. Xarxos was happy Trog was embracing the new life he had created for him. They’d undo it later, of course, but Xarxos was hoping the wisdom he gained from this experience would stick.
Armed, Xarxos closed his eyes and began to navigate the maze using his intuitive maze sense. All other Minotaurs had been taken out. Two gorgons remained. He turned several corners and heard a hiss of anger in front of him.
Draw, aim, loose.
The hiss became a gurgle.
Xarxos stepped past the disintegrating body.
Right, Right, Right, Right, Right. As he rounded the last corner, something struck him.
Scales wrapped around his chest, squeezing, choking.
Xarxos struggled, keeping his eyes firmly closed, and managed to free his arm. The gorgon was biting him, drawing blood. He could feel venom burning through his veins. Medusa’s poison did not turn people to stone. It killed them.
“Heal.” Xarxos gasped.
The burning subsided as the spell purged the venom from his body. He sagged in the scales as the spell took its toll. Medusa’s coils tightened and flexed, choking the air from his lungs. He tried to reach for an arrow, but his arm couldn’t reach that far.
“Ssso, you mussst be Xarxosss. Todd told me all about you and your machine bird ssspy in the sssky.” Medusa grinned, bearing her fangs. “He hasss been rewarded.”
“Todd would never-!” Xarxos gasped, the coils flexing the air out of his lungs.
“Book owner!” the Gorgon hissed. “You will give me the Book or I will crusssh your ribcage, ssssqueeze you until your eyeballssss pop out of your ssskull.”
“Can’t!” Xarxos gasped.
The snake flexed and Xarxos felt something crack. “Exsssplain!”
“It’s-” Xarxos coughed blood. “It’s a tattoo! I transformed it!”
“Where?” She raised him up and he could feel her gaze on his skin.
“T-taint.”
There was a hiss of disgust and Xarxos found himself being flipped upside down. The arrows in his quiver fell out. As he felt her hands probe his flesh, trying to work her nails into his hide, stabs of pain as she punctured him, his free hand scrabbled along the ground, searching for a loose arrow.
Medusa-for it could be no other-dug her fingers under his hide and peeled the flesh away Xarxos screamed in agony. His hand managed to snag an arrow as he was flipped back to face her.
“It’sss all mine!” Medusa cheered, “All mi-”
The arrow entered her throat and passed through the other side, severing her arteries. She gurgled, and wet warm fluid flooded down Xarxos’ arm.
Xarxos yanked the arrow towards him, ripping out Medusa’s throat.
The coils wrapped around him loosened and he drop to the ground, groaning, something rattling painfully with each breath he took. Motes of light danced beyond the closed lids of his eyes as Medusa disintegrated.
He opened his eyes and reached for the scrap of flayed hide. Xarxos hands closed on it.
“H-heal.” Xarxos croaked.
His chest popped and inflated as his bones returned to their proper place. Breathing became normal. The exhaustion of another healing spell overwhelmed him.
Xarxos sighed and let the encroaching darkness take him.
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
Sebastian waited for Trog at the entrance to the Hedge Maze. He was back into a more casual dress, hair perfectly maintained. If Trog didn’t know him, he’d seem almost genuinely happy to see him. But he saw the angry glint in his eye, the same one he’d had at the meeting.
“Good. You’re the only guard who responded to our calls.” Sebastian said.
“System is down. Windoors update knocked had a bug or something.” Trog shrugged.
“Damn Windoors!” Sebastian snarled, then patted his hair in place. “Sorry. Stressful day. Glad you finally saw my side of things.”
Trog wasn’t sure how he’d shifted reality, so he just smiled. “You wanted to meet with me, Mr. Cervantes?”
“Yes, we have a bit of an emergency. Someone broke into the Maze. Two people, actually, but we took care of one of them. But before we get to that…do you have a last name?”
“What?”
“It’s just been bothering. Trog…what? Your surname.”
“Ah. No surname, just Trog.”
“What, like Chair or the Artist Formerly Known As Prance?”
“Exactly.” Trog nodded. He did have a last name but he wasn’t giving it to Sebastian.
“Okay. My sister loves your plays, by the way. Demands we see them.”
“I’m glad she’s a fan.”
“What is your next play, if I may ask?”
“Um…” Trog thought for a moment. “American Psychotic, the Musical.”
“Huh. I’d actually pay to see that.” Sebastian shrugged. “Follow me.”
They wandered into the Hedge Maze, past a glorious sculpture of a Gryphon with a rather large phallus. Sebastian gave the impressive stone cock a pat and kept walking. They turned a corner and Trog found himself staring at the prone form of Xarxos, covered in blood. A bloody scrap of skin lay next to him in the grass, along with a broken bow and a bloody arrow.
“Is he…?”
“Dead?” Sebastian shook his head. “No. Killed some of my summons.”
“Why would one of your guards kill your summons?” Trog played dumb, noting the uniform.
“Book of Mind, maybe. That means someone else is out there.” Sebastian gestured.
Trog knelt next to Xarxos and picked up the bloody patch of hide. The tattoo of the Book was there. He closed his eyes, imagining how much it must have hurt.
“Body,” he whispered, willing himself back to normal.
Instead, his muscles seemed to deflate a bit, overtaken by chub. He frowned. Reality Audit? Or perhaps the original spell simply wasn’t done yet. Of course, Xarxos had cast something that would take time. He really would have to give in and be boring and old to get his true form back. That would definitely have to wait for now. He was about to get into a fight.
“Something wrong?” He heard Sebastian ask over his shoulder.
“Yes.” Trog stood, knees popping. “I see no marks on him. Blood isn’t his. What can the Book of Mind do?”
“Temporarily control someone. Knock them unconscious. All the guards on the estate are like this.” Sebastian paused and eyed him. “Except you.”
”I just arrived and was immediately sent to the office to sign paperwork.” Trog kept his gaze steady on Sebastian. “I did not mind control this person and I did not knock anyone unconscious.”
Sebastian cocked his head to the side as though listening to someone. “You speak true.”
“Shall I kill him?” Trog suggested before Sebastian could, pointing at the prone Minotaur.
“Kill the Minotaur who took down three gorgon by himself? Are you insane?” Sebastian blinked. “No. He was mind controlled. He isn’t a Book owner like we are. Rule number one: Good help is hard to find.”
“Good rule.” Trog frowned. “Wait. I thought Mark had your Book?”
“Oh, I canceled that contract. Paradox struck, but I had a few gods siphon most of the reality shift. Cost me most of my reserved energy pool. I’m basically at the same level as you are.” Sebastian shrugged. “That’s why I called you out here. I need your Book.”
“My Book?” Trog tried not to panic.
“I’ve been told that having more Books reduces the energy costs of spells.” Sebastian’s eyes softened. “I understand your hesitancy, but I am a man of my word. I will undo the reality shift on you and return you to your original form.”
“That’s…” Trog thought frantically. “Great, But I’m afraid to access my Book, I’ll, uh, need some privacy.”
“Privacy? Did you turn the Book into something…oh.” Sebastian saw where Trog was pointing. He turned around. “Hurry up, then.”
Trog shoved the skin down his pants and whispered “Object.”
His guiche piercing became heavier, hanging lower. Trog wondered why he’d ever gotten the thing, let alone keep it. But it was hidden and directly contacting his skin.
As soon as the rings merged, he pointed at Sebastian. “Inanimate.”
Sebastian shuddered and whirled around.
Trog was huffing, attempting to buckle his pants. Sebastian frowned and turned back to face away from the old bugbear, give him some privacy. Trog looked up, heart pounding. It hadn’t worked! Why hadn’t it worked?
He needed to buy himself some time.
Trog plucked one of his graying pubic hairs and whispered, “Object.”
His pubic hair swelled, turning brown, becoming a leatherbound book. 'The Book of Inanatomy' proclaimed the tome that appeared in his hand. He held it up with a smile when Sebastian turned around again.
“If you don’t mind my asking, where did you put it?”
“Guiche RIng.” Trog said.
Sebastian wrinkled his nose. “Um…”
“I’m handing you two Books and that’s your response?” Trog placed his hands on his hips.
“Two?” Sebastian leaned forward and read the cover. “Book of Body?”
Trog nodded. “Got it recently from a friend.”
“You know, I had my doubts about allying with you. But I have to say, you’ve surpassed my expectations.” Sebastian hesitated and grabbed the Book. “May I use the Book of Beast and Divination as well?”
“Are RK and Rusty back to normal?”
“Ah. No, haven’t gotten around to it. Take that as a no, then?”
Trog folded his arms and rested them on his prodigious belly. “No.”
Sebastian sighed and the left the Hedge Maze. “I know your first impressions of me weren’t pleasant. It is true that I intended to leave them as they were. But you’re a smart man. I’m not trying to steal the Books, I’m just using them to shore up my defenses.”
Sebastian crouched behind the Gryphon statue’s plinth and pulled out a Book. He attempted to merge his Book with the false Book Trog had created. Obviously, he had little success.
“I don’t understand, shouldn’t they merge?” Sebastian glanced over at Trog.
“Um, are you sure the Book of Myth is real?” Trog asked. “I, myself, carry fakes.”
“Yes, of course this is the real deal!” Sebastian snarled. “Do you think I’m doing this for fun?”
“Not at all. I was simply confirming that is, indeed, the real book. It would have been very embarrassing if I stole a fake Book.” Trog pointed at the Gryphon statue. “Animate.”
The Gryphon’s stony beak opened. It flexed its wings experimentally. Then it snapped at the Book of Myth.
“Jorge! No!” Sebastian threw himself out of the way, the sharp stone beak still managing to carve a line across his hands. Blood welled form the deep wound a few seconds later.
“You named your statue Jorge?” Trog cocked a brow.
“Former employee,” Sebastian hissed. “Legendary Summon: Hecatonchires!”
The clouds in the sky parted as an enormous sandalled foot descended onto the lawn. The ground roiled as it touched down. The impact of the other foot sent Trog rolling onto the grass.
The hundred-armed giant, Aegaeen, stared down at him, head easily cresting a thousand feet high. One of the huge arms reached down and plucked the stone gryphon off Sebastian and other hands started pulling it apart as easily as a child plucked a butterfly’s wings.
“Surrender. We can put this little rebellion behind us.” Sebastian pulled himself to his feet. “You think you can fight a Titan? Is that it, Trog? Must I punish you?”
“You overestimate yourself.” Trog pointed at the fake Book Mark. “Object.”
The pin fell of the new grenade and dropped into the grass.
“Three, two,o-” Trog intoned.
Sebastian screamed and flung the Books away, diving for cover.
Trog dove for the Book of Myth.
A giant hand swept him up.
He rose and rose, coming face to eye with the overgrown titan. The hand began to squeeze. Trog began to scream.
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
Sebastian lifted his head from the grass.
There had been no explosion.
Overhead, high in the air, someone was wailing. He let out a breath. So it had been a trick, a ploy to get him to drop the Book. Trog was quite the adversary, but he was likely done for, now.
Sebastian walked over and picked up his Book. He peered up at the giant in the sky.
“Don’t kill him yet, I need him capable of telling me where the Book is.” Sebastian called.
The screams lessened.
“Tiny man cast spell.” Titan murmured, though the voice was loud enough to shake the windows on Sebastian’s mansion.
“Which one?”
“Heal.”
“Fine. Lower him down carefully.”
Trog descended, the old bugbear squished tightly in the Titan’s fist. Sebastian grinned. He would be getting all the Books, now. He didn’t have to play nice.
“Books.” Sebastian held out his hand.
“Sir.” The Titan murmured.
“Not now.”
“Behind you.” The Titan’s hands were moving towards something behind Sebastian.
Sebastian whirled just in time for a stone Gryphon cock to club him in the head. His skull was crushed, brain, pulped, one eye dangling from its socket. He died instantly. Xarxos huffed, tears running down his face, as he watched the corpse twitch.
“I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to hit you so hard!” Xarxos sobbed.
The Titan dropped Trog onto the ground. Trog hissed, his body hurting. The Titan disintegrated into a cloud of golden motes, drifting off into the sea.
“Get the Book.” Trog said. “Or it goes to another Owner. Quick!”
Xarxos reached down to grab the Book of Myth. It disappeared just before his fingers could close on it with a *pop*. Trog stared at the empty space in the grass where the Book had been.
“It…it shouldn’t have disappeared that quickly.” Trog stared in horror and confusion.
Xarxos gasped. “Trog, look!”
Golden motes of light were rising from Sebastian’s body. It disintegrated and drifted away, leaving nothing behind. Trog and Xarxos stared.
“Thanks boys.” A feminine voice said.
Xarxos and Troy looked up.
Sitting on a dragon, looking rather pleased with her self, Sophia waved the Book of Myth at them. She was wearing all black, and the dragon didn't seem all that colorful either. She didn’t seem to be nice Sophia, is what he was certain of.
“I’ll take the rest of them too, please and thank you.” Sophia’s smile turned dark. “Or I’ll burn you all alive.”