“So, uh, my ‘secret identity’ aside,” Mary said, “did you come in here to browse with us? Or just to show off your new servants? ‘Cause they are pretty good-looking, I’m not gonna lie.”
Tyler considered telling her about the flute, or maybe even taking Rachel’s advice to try testing the flute on Mary and the girls, but something dawned on him: the old shopkeeper, assuming he hadn’t already vanished like they tended to in all the stories, would probably know something about the flute and how it worked. The worst that could happen would be Tyler would waste a few minutes there and back. Compared to actually changing people, it was a safer option.
“I… was going to ask how much longer you thought this might take?” He said.
Mary sighed. “Getting tired of waiting for us while we appreciate the finer things?”
Tyler raised his hands defensively. “No, it’s not like that, I just wanted to make sure I had time to go back to this other shop. There’s something I forgot to ask about.”
Mary shrugged. “You’ll probably have time. What shop is it?”
Tyler pulled out the mall’s map pamphlet. The fact that it showed up there at all was hopefully a sign it wasn’t one of those magical disappearing shops. “This antique shop over here.”
“An antique store you say?” Mary looked it over. “Well, that sounds interesting.” She put the jewelry she was examining back on the counter. “I’ll go with you. Who knows, they might have some nice jewelry over there, too.”
Even if he said no, Tyler knew she’d probably come anyway. “Uh, sure.”
When they’d arrived, the store was just as empty of customers as it had been before.
“Back already?” The old man rasped. “I don’t give refunds or returns, so-” He smiled slightly as he saw the two snake women trailing after Tyler. “Oh, I see you’ve been enjoying your product already. Sadly, I doubt you, or your friends will find any items here that will interest you as much as that flute did.”
“I’m not here looking for another item!” Tyler said. “I came here to find out…” He paused, not sure how to continue talking about the flute’s weird power with Mary around, who didn’t seem to notice it. “...Exactly what this flute is supposed to do?”
The old man snickered. “It makes music, obviously.”
Tyler grit his teeth. “You KNOW that’s not the whole story, man! You knew that this flute had something to do with what happened to Rachel and Amber! Tell me what you know!”
Mary cocked an eyebrow. “What happened to who now?”
“Do you know this young lady?” The shopkeeper asked.
“Why do you need to know that?” Tyler huffed, his frustration growing.
“Because it may be awkward for you in the long run if people you don’t trust took an interest in this.”
Tyler looked back at Mary. “...Yeah, I trust her.”
“First, I’ll say you’re not too likely to find that flute’s limits on your own, for the simple fact that you subconsciously picked the flute because it’s magic resonated with your desires. You happen to already enjoy what it’s capable of; that is, turning people into animals native to Egypt, while still retaining some aspects of their humanity. Perhaps even enhancing some of said aspects, if the, ah… measurements of those two young ladies are anything to go by.”
“And their calling me ‘Master?’”
“Anyone changed will also come to realize their new purpose is serving you, desiring your song above nearly anything else. The spell also places a charm on them that keeps people from thinking any of their changes, including their devotion to you, as being abnormal.”
Tyler blinked. “If you knew it could do all that, why did you sell it to me?”
“Because it’s meant for you. Do what you like with it.” The old man waved him off. “Rule the world. Get a harem. Start a band. It’s not my property anymore, the world’s your oyster.”
Well, Tyler couldn’t deny that he was a fan of the general Ancient Egyptian aesthetic, and of furry stuff.
“...There has to be some kind of catch.”
“I told you to use it responsibly remember? Those changed are perfectly happy to serve you. But if you say, treat your servants as convenient punching bags after a bad day, or make them suffer for your own amusement, then Karma will find you. There are also occasionally Cosmic Tough Guys who pop up every now and then in these universes who exist just to crush, pass judgment, or browbeat anyone who inherits a treasure like this just because. And tend to have nonsensical overpowered abilities from nowhere. Thankfully they don't show up in every timeline."
"...Can I just give away or bury the flute somewhere so I don't need to worry about alien super-men bearing down on me?"
"Oh you CAN! But you won't. Otherwise that flute wouldn't have subconsciously called to you. These treasures are only bound to those who'd actually make use of them. Otherwise you'd have come here FIRST and demanded I find a way to restore your two lady friends to 'normal'."
Tyler lowered his head. "... You're right."
"Hold your head high kid! I told you, the world is your oyster."
"But how am I supposed to support people wanting to work for me? Let alone say snake people trying to drive cars? What are the exact rules for this flute?"
"Trust me when I say that these things have a way of fixing themselves. Don't drive yourself TOO insane over the details. I'm not allowed to tell you every detail of how your new toy works."
"Not allowed by whom?"
"The ones whom I owe the license to sell these sorts of things of course. I'm meant to be just a middle man, even if I own the store and the stock. You have no clue which companies own which companies owned by companies you didn't even know existed. It's much the same here. Trust me when I say it's better if you don't drive yourself crazy and focus on your own universe, and your own Earth."
"See Master? What did I tell you? The more people you improve with your music the better!" Rachel said rather smugly.
"Wait one second here!" Mary leaned in close putting her hands on the counter. "I've read the same stories as Tyler, and I know this stuff works! Okay, I read them for the entitled jerks who always get what's coming to them, but I know that if this place works like I think it does, then I wouldn't be here unless there was some trinket or other that I could find."
The shopkeeper shrugged. "Yes. But you came along with Tyler remember. So you didn't find this place, or rather, this place didn't find you on its own. And if you have read those stories, then you know the person trying to get their hot little hands on a magical object too tend to have it backfire."
Mary for her part, HEARD from the shopkeeper how there was an enchantment for her to causally accept Tyler's servants were Tyler's servants, and that the animal-people nudists were animal-people nudists, but, she was fine with that. Maybe that was part of the enchantment too, but she couldn't bring herself to care.
"Okay, granted. But since your shop didn't vanish into thin air before Tyler came back here, that must mean he came here for a reason, and that means I'm here for a reason."
"Is Master's friend really discussing the laws of narrative causality with an antique shop owner?" Rachel asked.
Amber nodded. "So what? It's fun to hear them talk about it!"
The Shopkeeper sighed. "Fine. If you can find something, anything that calls to you, and you have the money to pay for it (I'm still a shop keeper), it'll be yours to do with as you please, with the same caveat that even if you say, get bongo-drum that turns people into tiki statues (I sold that to a man a few dozen universes back), you're to treat them as precious treasures, not disposable objects."
It wasn't that Tyler wanted to be the only kid on the block with a new toy, but he did worry what kind of treasure might call to Mary.