"I don't like the way you speak to me sometimes" I decide that, armed with my new found powers I am willing to have it out with my boss at last. It's not like she gave me the raise of her own free will after all.
"You don't?" Christina folded her arms and looked annoyed "I'm arranging for you to get a raise and a bonus and that is how you thank me?"
"Yeah" I shrug "You can be pretty sarcastic and contemptuous sometimes and it pisses me off. Besides, it's not like the bonus or raise were your idea."
"Really? I'm pretty sure they were" she looks like she genuinely believes this "And you will get them. But I can't always be super polite with you when you keep messing up or not following simple instructions. I guess I try and use humour to try and take the edge off"
"You use humour like anyone does to make people laugh" I reply, feeling my annoyance levels rising again "And at my expense. It's humiliating"
"Humiliating? Really?" Christina replies cynically.
"Yes" I reiterate "Do you have any idea what it feels like to be humiliated in front of your colleagues?"
"Well, no. Probably because I would never do anything humiliating in front of them"
"Oh really?" I reply as I prepare to once again enter Narrator mode "To her great surprise Christina found that she was compelled to spend the rest of the working day behaving as if she were an animal, specifically.."