The roar of the other monsters, at least to Bill, sounded human. To the mass of people running through the streets of Chicago however, all they heard was the deafening screeches of terrifying monsters, ones that had appeared out of nowhere and were already destroying the city as they flailed about, as if they didn't know how to work their bodies. And to Bill, the bellowing screams of rage and anguish sent a shiver through his body all the way to his tail.
'My tail. Holy fucking shit what is even happening!?' The teenage kaiju thought to himself, looking down at his claws once more. But before Bill could get further introspective, the growing layer of clouds over the metropolis parted and the immense version of the Ahn'Ger Stone descended from the sky and hung over the city. And Bill noticed, for the first time, the massive crack that ran length-wise down one side of the gem. It began to pulse rhythmically, flashes of green gold light rippling across the city as Bill suddenly felt drawn towards it.
"Tammy, look!" Bill said to his wiggling girlfriend, who was busy squirming her bulk between the large support beams that held up the pier. "Its broken! That must be why the wish went wrong!"
"I don't care!" Tammy grunted back in frustration, more streamers of webbing flying from her mandibles as her strange new body crushed the wooden and concrete supports, causing the structure above her to groan dangerously as it struggled to hold the weight of the shopping center plus the mass of flowering seaweed, "I have to hide! I...I can't be seen like this! Just go grab it and wish us back! Please!"
Bill watched as his girlfriend covered herself and the underside of Navy Pier in the disgusting webbing and felt the need to say...something, but the urge to get closer to the giant Stone was starting to overpower his higher senses. He gave Tammy a shrug and began to march forward out of the water, his titanic bulk shaking the ground as he moved. As he towered over the buildings he could see the other 'monsters' doing the same, tripping and flopping over themselves and crushing buildings in their path as they were drawn inexorably towards each other. Bill was suddenly grateful for his far more normal body and the tail that hung out behind him, allowing him to maintain an almost normal walk as he carefully tried to make his way through the city streets, wincing every time he felt his leathery body brush against a building and leave it nearly demolished in his wake.
Bill was so caught up in careful stride that, as he moved inland, he never saw a tendril of seaweed weakly rise from the formless mass that sat on Navy Pier, stretching out towards him as if to hold him back.
"At least I'm doing better than that bug thing" Bill said, looking to the south and the cloud of dust and shrieks. The enormous wasp-like creature was the monster closest to Bill was dominated by two massive scythes for forearms, both of them digging at the ground while two clawed legs that were almost hilariously undersized for it's body struggled to lift it's body upwards. The two large wings on it's back beat out of sync with each other in frenetic bursts while a long dragon-fly tail flopped back and forth. The head of the monster was angular and sharp, two huge red eyes with glowing white pupils frantically darting around in it's head while a decidedly feminine cry came from it's fang filled mouth. As the creature collapsed back on it's stomach it let loose a shrill swear of frustration that caused Bill to pause from sudden recognition.
It was Gloria!
Bill's first thought was to move towards her and help her up because at his heart, Bill was a decent human being.
'Not that it really applies at this moment' Bill thought to himself as he looked back at his massive reptile body. 'Besides, she's the entire reason we're in this mess. Let her figure her own damn self out' Bill let out a cruel sounding chuckle as he turned away from the struggling insect and instead continued his march towards the enormous Stone as the other two creatures finally seemed to understand how their bodies worked.
The red...pterodactyl thing began moving in an awkward, bird-like hop as it drug it's burning body across the urban landscape, smoke and ash billowing up behind it from the gusts produced by it's enormous wingspan as it tried, several times, to take flight before letting out a roar. Bill recognized that voice as well. He'd know it anywhere.
It was Rob Bolstrum. But what was he doing there!? The logic in Bill's mind try to think of a reason why the bully would have been there in monster form. So far the wishes had only affected Bill, Tammy, Gloria and the victim of Gloria's previous wish, Willow, so it was clear there was some form of localization going on...But why was Rob there? Unless...Unless Rob had been lurking nearby earlier that morning? Bill was suddenly glad that he'd waited a few minutes later for Tom, even if it had ended up resulting in this chaos.
As the group of monsters converged in the center of the city, buildings toppling from their careless, struggling movements, Bill looked up at the towering three headed gold dragon that seemed to be having a very intense conversation with itself. And Bill's blood, if he wasn't already cold blooded enough, turned to ice.
Big Jon's voice was coming out of the center head as it snarled commands at the two other heads. The right head seemed just as angry, another masculine voice coming out of it, one that Bill recognized as Jules, one of Big Jon's lackeys...But the other head, the left one that seemed utterly terrified and was jerking itself in every direction, had a female voice that Bill didn't recognize spilling out of a toothy mouth.
"Shut up Tara!" Big Jon's head said as he snapped at her, "I don't know what the fuck is happening either!"
"JONATHAN! I'M SCARED!" The left head squealed as it wildly curled around, throwing the massive conjoined body off balance, "THIS ISN'T REAL! I'M AT HOME IN BED! WE GOT IN A CAR CRASH AND WE'RE IN AN AMBULANCE! OH GOD WHAT IF WE'RE, LIKE, DEAD! I JUST WANNA WAKE UP! I NEVER SHOULD HAVE AGREED TO TAKE OYU AND YOUR FRIEND TO SCHOOL!"
"I SAID SHUT THE FUCK UP!" Big Jon's head snarled and his neck began to curl around the left head, constricting it. The left head screeched in pain but ultimately went silent, slinking away as best as it could and cowering close to the golden scaled torso it was attached to as Big Jon's head released a snort of dominance. Whoever 'Tara' was, she was clearly in a horrible position and Bill couldn't help but feel a pang of pity of pity for the former woman, and a surge of anger laced guilt for having made the wish that put all of them in this position.
The damaged city and the hundreds of thousands of people that were suffering and had even been crushed as the four titans converged beneath the Stone didn't even factor into Bill's mind, however. Bill allowed himself a growling chuckle as the bird-boy stumbled in his hopping motion, collapsing on his beak (and through several buildings) as he tried to stand upright on his stubby claws.
"Holy shit, is that you Rob!?" Jules's voice came from the golden...Jon-monster's right head as it curled down towards the clumsy red avian.
"YES IT'S ME, you'd think with three damn heads you'd have half a fuckin' brain!" Rob snapped back.
"WILL YOU ALL JUST SHUT UP!?" Gloria screeched as she managed to perform some kind of hovering hop as the wings on her chitinous torso seemed to finally sync together. Bill could almost see a relieved expression on her frighteningly toothy face as she perched herself on the side of the Sears Tower, the skyscraper taking the brunt of her weight as metal groaned dangerously. "I can...I can fix this if you just help me get to that thing!" She raised a vicious looking scythe towards the crystalline surface of the Ahn'Ger Stone.
Bill's eyes went wide in alarm. The last thing anyone needed was for two of the worst people in the world to get a hold of the Stone! "GLORIA! DON'T-" Bill yelled, but it was too late.
"Titsapolous is right!" Rob said, flapping his wings and sending dust, ash and cars flying about in a small tornado of debris, "I was hiding in Shitterman's basement just like you said, Big Jon! I heard them yelling and snuck up right as Shitterman wished for something about Bug breath over here being a monster! It's his fault!" Rob raised his beak and pointed towards Bill as ten eyes turned to him.
"Strasserman..." Big Jon hissed as realization hit him. All three heads, even the cowering one named Tara seemed to take on Big Jon's hateful demeanor, coiling towards Bill, who suddenly felt as if he was inches from a very dangerous snake. "Maybe this is all just...providence. Maybe the universe wants me to kick your queer little ass..." the heads were silent for a moment as Bill struggled to keep track of them as them slithered in the air around him.
"Or maybe I'll just take Birdbrain's advice and use that thing for myself!" Big Jon's heads snapped away from Bill as the golden colossus charged forward towards the Stone, hate in it's eyes.
"NO!" Bill roared. He couldn't let Big Jon make a wish. He'd be dead! Or worse! Bill paid no attention to the buildings crumbling to dust around him as he waded through the center of the city on a collision course with his enemy, tackling the golden behemoth to the ground. Behind him, Bill never saw Gloria leap off the building she had landed on, scythes out-stretched for the gem as a plume of ash and fire lurched upwards to intercept her with a deafening squawk.
And none of the monsters noticed a flash of green lighting from the sky as the Ahn'Ger Stone began to pulse faster and faster as the city disappeared in a cloud of fire, smoke and claws, a shimmering ring of green light appearing in a miles long circle around the city of Chicago.