Septimus, the wizard, was having a hard time finding people to come to his magic shop. A vast assortment of magic items, and not a single person was intrigued. Oh, of course this place was meant for people not looking for it, but at the same time, you’d expect SOMEBODY to actually buy something.
Nope. Mostly just thieves and assholes, which made good money as magical pets (sending them to the magical pet store), but weren’t a sustainable source of income.
Matilda the witch proposed an idea. Maybe his products were just marketed wrong. No one liked crystal balls and antique mirrors anymore, and devices were hard to make magical due to how complex they are. He was especially good at alchemy, so making a transformation restaurant seemed like a good idea. But it was hard to mask potions in food, so Matilda suggested he make magic ice cream. A novel idea from his dear friend the witch, so he went about the creation of such an ice cream shop.
[Septimus’s Superb Scoops], an ice cream store where each flavor and topping had a different effect on the consumer’s body. In addition, this was a touch from Septimus himself, leaving the store changed reality and would give you a new set of memories that matched your old form.
Flavor examples proved difficult to come up with, but were rather fun:
Chocolate darkens skin (the more you eat, the darker your skin), while vanilla lightened your skin. Mint was strange, and gave you plant-like skin, while various fruity flavor had different stereotypes, from bubblegum bimbo/himbo, to rainbow sherbet hippie, to mountain dew gamer, to bookworm apple pie. Toppings allowed you to choose which body parts, with assorted nuts being genitals, cherries being your head, and whipped cream being your body. Septimus especially designed it so that every flavor that a customer saw would match their interests and preferences, whether conscious or not, allowing for 100% (eventual) customer satisfaction. And of course, unhappy with the eventual result of your changes? Septimus had free complimentary drinks (both sweetened and unsweetened) that completely reset transformations.
Finally finishing his work, Septimus waited at the counter for his first customer. In the oncoming onslaught of summer, he knew that eventually someone would arrive.