Leah just sat there for a while. Her mind was a whirlwind of thoughts, dreams, fears, and nightmares. She was decidedly uncomfortable with how things were progressing. The diapers, onesies, bottles, and pacifiers were fun. More fun than she had expected. They made her feel comfortable and loved for the first time in years. She wanted more of it. But her stepmother's actions today were just too much. Leah had seen a side of Tina that she didn't think she wanted to see. She was very much on the fence about the whole breastfeeding thing. She definitely wanted it, but to have Tina force it on her so quickly like that was more than a little overwhelming. And then there was Tina's sudden change in attitude regarding her own privacy. Leah accepted that Tina would be seeing a lot of her, it came with the diapers, but she was *not* ready to see that much of Tina.
Leah needed a distraction to clear the images out of her mind until she could discuss them with her stepmom. The TV had been left on, but her shows had ended and some boring soap opera had started. She grabbed the remote and changed to one of the cartoon channels. She usually avoided them during the middle of the day when the programming changed to the more childish shows, but since it was the weekend she was able to find something that even someone her age, her real age, couldn't object to. She lost herself in a couple of episodes until Tina finished her morning routine and came back downstairs. Leah was relived to see that she was wearing high-waist jeans and a blouse that covered her up to the neck. It made things easier.
"Tina..." she said hesitantly. "Um... We, uh... We need to talk. About the whole babying thing."
"Sure." Tina said brightly, sitting down on the sofa. "What would you like to talk about?"
"I think... I think we need to set some... Ground rules..."
"Oh? What kind of ground rules?"
Leah took a deep breath. This whole thing had been difficult enough to even think about, let alone say out loud. She decided to just get it over with. In a rush she vented everything that was on her mind. How she was fine with being babied like this. How she enjoyed the bottles and being fed breakfast. How she was somewhat okay, but still quite hesitant about... breastfeeding. And, most importantly, how she was not okay with Tina's sudden lack of modesty. There were tears welling in her eyes when she was finished.
Tina just stared down at her stepdaughter, nonplussed. She opened and closed her mouth a few times and shifted in her seat. Finally, she slid down off the sofa and onto her knees on the carpet in front of Leah. She took the small teen's hands and held them tightly in her own.
"I'm sorry." She said earnestly. "I'm really, really sorry. I don't know what I was thinking. I was just so happy that I could finally have a baby... sort of... that I must have lost myself and my common sense."
"What do you mean 'finally have a baby?'" Leah asked, taken aback.
"I don't know if your father told you," she said, "I don't really like talking it about it much myself, but I'm not capable of bearing children of my own. Something didn't... develop quite right and I've been infertile my entire life."
Leah noticed that there were tears in her eyes, mirroring the ones in her own.
"I always wanted to have children," Tina continued, "but the doctors said that it would be impossible. Even with in vitro or a donor egg I would never be able to bear a child within me. Even having a surrogate wouldn't work. My only options were to adopt or find a man who already had a child of his own. But every man I ever met was never right for me, and many of them couldn't take the fact that I could never give them children. I actually went into the childcare business to fill the gaping pit in my heart. When I met your father it was almost a dream come true. He didn't care that I couldn't have children. He already had a beautiful daughter and he was willing to let me call you my own. If you would allow it."
She paused and wiped her eyes.
"It pained me that we didn't seem to get along at first. It took me a while to realize that you were much more mature than both your looks and your age. Then you suddenly expressed an interest in being babied and I was elated. I guess I lost my head there. I swear I won't let it happen again."
Leah stared at her hands, still clasped tightly in Tina's, and then up at her stepmother's tear-streaked face. she felt a brief pang of guilt. She hadn't meant to make Tina cry like this, just set some boundaries so she wouldn't have to see anything like... that... again. She felt the tears in her own eyes finally spill over.
"I'm sorry too." Leah whispered. "I... I didn't know..."
"It's alright babygirl." Tina soothed. "It's not like I ever even tried to tell you. You couldn't possibly have known. You said you wanted some ground rules. Let's talk about that and put this behind us, alright?"
Leah nodded, and Tina stood up, pulling the young teen to her feet. They sat down on the couch and began discussing how Leah would prefer things to be done while she was in Tina's care as well as in daycare.
"Like I said," Leah began, "I like being diapered and babied. I want it. More than anything I've ever wanted before, even being... even being treated like an adult. I don't know why. Maybe I've been trying so hard to be seen as bigger and older than I actually was because deep down I knew I wanted something like this and was scared of it. I'm 15. I should be thinking about college, not cribs. But regardless of that, I want this my way, and I don't want... Don't want..."
"Don't want me to make things even more awkward than they already are?" Tina supplied.
"Yes. Please just... Just don't do something like... that... again. I know that changing me and giving me baths means that you'll have to see my... see me, but I really don't want to see... you."
There was a moment of silence between the two.
"Alright." Tina said gently. "I will be more careful about that in the future. What about breastfeeding though? You did say that you were interested in it. Would you like me to try it with you again?"
"Maybe." Leah mumbled, blushing. "But not right now. I need some more time to... think about it."
"Very well. What else?"
"Remember how I said that I wanted the daycare workers to know about me while I'm there?"
"Yes, did you change your mind?"
"No, but... I'm worried how they might treat me."
"They will treat you like they would treat any other child in their care." Tina's voice was suddenly severe. "I am very firm on that point. If they do anything wrong, anything at all, you tell me immediately."
"Thank you." Leah said, relieved, but the apprehension sprang right back into her voice. "What about the other parents?"
"What other parents?"
"You know. The parents of the other kids at the daycare. I don't know if I want them knowing or not. It wouldn't be right for me to be spending time with their kids like that without them knowing, but I don't want people gossiping."
"I think I have a solution for that." Tina said smugly. "I'll put you in the class that is mostly employee children or the children of people I know quite well. None of them will object to you being there. If they do then I can just juggle their kids to another class and bring in kids whose parents are more open. I promise that there won't be any gossip about this if I can help it."
"And what about the neighbors?" Leah asked. "I don't want them to know about this. They've known me and dad for years. Some even knew... Even knew my Mom. What would they think of me suddenly wanting to be a baby?"
"I don't think the neighbors will be too big a problem. None of them seem to be the nosy type and we can keep you out of sight if any come calling. Unless you want them to see you. I think that as you get more comfortable you'll start to be more open about this. We'll figure things out as they come along. But what about your friends? I think they'll be suspicious about you missing a week of school and then avoiding them all spring break."
Leah hadn't even thought about her friends. She didn't have many. There was Carla, her best friend. She doubted that she would be able to hide this from her for very long, but Carla might be understanding. She did admit to Leah that she was bi, knowing that if word got out her family would send her to a Catholic school to "fix" her. She might be able to trust Carla. Jenny was out. They were barely friends as it was and Jenny seemed to be trying to get in with the popular girls. A bit of juicy gossip like this would get her straight into the inner circle. She wasn't sure about Emma. Emma was too new to the school for Leah to know much about her. Aside from the fact that she was shunted into their "weird" friend group by default. Most of the other friends in her group were complete unknowns. All she really knew was that if this got out she would probably end up a social outcast.
"Let's try and keep this from my friends." She said. "I don't know how they would react. If they come looking for me we can just say I'm really sick. Maybe later I might be comfortable telling one or two of them about this."
"Okay." Tina said. "So that's no immodest behavior from me and I need to keep this a secret from everyone who doesn't need to know and keep them quiet about it. Anything else?"
"Not that I can think of, but I guess we can add more if anything comes up later?"
"That's acceptable, but I have a couple of rules for you to follow as well."
Leah looked up, surprised. Rules for her? She hoped that her stepmother wasn't setting her up for something.
"First, you are not allowed to change yourself or even remove your diaper. That will be my job from here onward. That also means no bathing yourself either since I have to be there to undress you. I will also be the one to feed you. When you are at daycare you will have to put up with other people changing and feeding you as well since I won't be available to do it. Second, since you are committing to this there will be no backing out. You will have your full two weeks whether you like it or not, and I can extend that if I feel it's necessary."
Leah opened her mouth to protest that last bit. What did she mean by "if it's necessary?" Tina anticipated her response and cut her off.
"If you break the rules I will have to punish you. That could include keeping you in diapers beyond the two weeks. That would mean that you would be returning to school in them, though I won't be so mean as to dress you in baby clothes if I do. I will still try to keep things discrete, as promised."
"But what if-"
"If you don't want your friends and classmates finding out then you will just have to be careful. I won't make it obvious, but you will have to do the rest. If you don't want to have that risk then I suggest you behave for the next two weeks. It shouldn't be that difficult."
Leah knew it wouldn't. The rules were really quite simple. All she had to do was enjoy being babied for two weeks without too much fuss. And Tina did promise that she would keep it all secret.
"Is that acceptable? I won't make you crawl or use baby talk if you don't want to. You can even act like a teen whenever you feel like it. Just so long as you stay in your diapers."
"Okay." Leah said in a small voice.
"What was that?"
"Okay." Leah said, a bit louder.
"Good. And one more thing. I want you to call me 'Mommy' for the next two weeks as well."
Leah looked shocked. Did Tina really just demand that?
"Did you hear me? You are to call me 'Mommy.'"
"Yes, but-"
"Yes what?"
"Yes m- mommy, but-"
"Good." Tina was smiling happily now. "You don't have to say it in front of everyone, just here at home and at daycare, alright?"
"Yes mommy."
"Now, do you need to be changed yet?"
Tina reached forward and patted Leah's diaper.