It was hours later, and at least 30 flushes later, that Chris staggered back to his now single room. He figured it had to do with conservation of mass laws or something like that. He'd absorbed Andrew, and then he'd passed the big shit, as a bunch of little shits. Chris chuckled to himself. Andrew had quit his screaming and struggling about an hour earlier, and started just letting the crap flow out of him like the real asshole he'd become. Stopping at his door jamb, Chris looked up and down the empty hall. It was empty.
He flexed his gut and let loose a long hot smelly one in the hallway. The blast was followed by what sounded like a series of little toots, which Chris was sure he wasn't doing. He pulled down his pants and it was clear that toots were coughs. Andrews coughs.
"Man, what you been eating, Chris?" gasped Andrew.
"Aspargus, broccoli, and lots of bean burritos, but couldn't you taste it on the way out?" Andrew asked straining to release more gas. This time he produced a toot.
Andrew giggled, "Ooh, guess you're running out of gas. You wanna grab my iPod off the dresser, and plug the ear buds in down here, so I can get some sleep."
"Dude, you expect me to plug an iPod in my ass? Andrew you're not my room mate anymore, you're my asshole. Assholes don't listen to iPods, assholes don't talk, and you my Andrew are now my asshole, so shut up." Chris said clenching his butt cheeks and hopping into bed.
Chris looked around the room, and decided he'd sleep in Andrew's bed tonight. He pulled back the sheets and went to sleep in his t-shirt and boxers. Or he tried to go to sleep. Andrew started singing, bad rap songs out of key. One of the neighbors pounded on the wall, "Keep it down in there, I got class tomorrow!"
Chris rolled over on his back to smother the noise, but he could feel the vibration like a visious twitch, and he could hear the muffled words. He stared at the ceiling for about 15 minutes. Finally, Chris relented, and got Andrew his iPod. That seemed to quiet down his new bunkmate, and Chris finally went to sleep.
Chris blinked his eyes. He was in the communal bathroom holding his toothbrush, but he was standing in an open toilet stall. Out of habit, Chris raised the sudsy toothbrush to his mouth, and started on his teeth. He could hear a swishing sound, then he flexed his knees and projected rinse water out his asshole. With the toothbrush lodged deep in his own mouth, Chris realized that Andrew had been brushing his teeth with Chris' toothbrush. Chris ran bare-assed to the sink and washed his mouth out thoroughly. He could hear Andrew laughing.