"GOOOOOOOOOD MORNING BOYS!" Barrie’s voice boomed through the screen’s speakers as the quartet gathered in the living room. “HOW’S EVERYONE’S DAY GOING SO FAR, HM?”
“Great!” Kai piped with a cheeky grin. “I didn’t realize how adorable I’d become until I looked in the mirror this morning – how could anybody out there vote for any of you guys when I’m just too cute for words?”
“That’s the spirit, little dude.” Jackson beamed as he ruffled the boy’s soft, fluffy, jet-black hair. “You don’t miss a step.”
“Though I wish he would every once in a while.” Ernesto smirked as he playfully punched Kai’s skinny forearm. “Kid’s unflappable so long as Scott’s not around to screw him over.”
The three of them chuckled amongst themselves as though Scott wasn’t even there, hot waves of shame sweeping over the abashed boy even though the moment was a mere continuation of the morning to that point. His day had begun when he came downstairs to find the other three contestants having breakfast without him, laughing and chatting between slurps of cereal. It was Kai who first noticed Scott entering the kitchen, his bright and boyish features soured by a hateful scowl as his fellow eight-year-old silently and sheepishly hopped onto a chair and poured himself a bowl.
“Morning, guys.” Scott peeped.
“Morning.”
“Sup dude.”
Though Ernesto and Jackson were at least willing to offer curt greetings, Kai simply stared at his former partner before turning back to the bigger boys as though Scott had never showed up at all. They returned to their previous conversation – something about who they’d turn into kids if they got the chance – while the shrunken spy glumly poked at his Cap’n Crunch. As much as it stung to be excluded, Scott could at least take a small bit of solace from seeing Kai acting like his typical cheerful self again. Even if that cheer was a bit forced, it did Scott good to see Kai smile – so long as he didn’t think about the way that smile vanished whenever he looked Scott’s way.
“WELL, ENOUGH WITH THE PLEASANTRIES!” Barrie declared, brining Scott back to the there and then. “WE’VE GOT ANOTHER FUN DAY OF ACTIVITIES PLANNED FOR OUR CONTESTANTS, BUT BEFORE WE GET TO THOSE…IT’S TIME FOR THE DAILY CHALLENGE!”
Scott forced himself to focus as the screen was bombarded with confetti and excitement emojis, grateful for the opportunity to push away thoughts of Kai by concentrating on the task at hand. Though he may have had a point about cuteness swaying the final tally, at this point in the contest it was still the bigger the better. If Scott could win some age back through this challenge it’d make his snooping that much easier – make it so he wouldn’t have to rely on Kai to get the job done.
“AND GIVEN THE CURRENT AGES OF OUR CONTESTANTS, I THINK IT’S ONLY RIGHT WE BRING BACK A FAVORITE FROM SEASON ONE – THAT’S RIGHT, EVERYBODY, IT’S TIME FOR TICKLE TORTURE!”
The reveal boosted Scott’s confidence even as the hair stood up on the back of his neck. Over the course of his career he’d been subject to literal torture more times than he’d like to remember, and on every occasion his captor broke before he did. The only thing that gave Scott pause was his memory of watching season one of No Girls Allowed as research for this mission, of the first time the show put the tickle resisting skills of its contestants to the test. He’d never forget how the burly prison guard turned tiny towheaded preschooler squealed with uncontrollable laughter as his little legs pinwheeled and tears streamed down his chubby, glowing cheeks – never forget the way the horrified tot burst into tears when the other contestants and the rest of the world laughed at the huge wet spot that had appeared on the front of his Paw Patrol shorts. Scott had been trained in counter-torture tactics and was twice the age that poor boy had been when he had an accident in front of millions of live viewers. But, just the same, he couldn’t get the anguish of that heartbroken four-year-old out of his mind…
“FIRST THINGS FIRST – LET’S RANDOMLY GENERATE SOME MATCHUPS! BAM!”
The contestants’ names appeared on the screen in the pairings of ERNESTO vs. SCOTT and JACKSON vs. KAI.
“ALRIGHT THEN! AS THE BIGGER BOYS, ERNESTO AND JACKSON WILL BE THE TICKLERS – THEY WIN IF, WITHIN ONE MINUTE, THEY CAN MAKE THEIR YOUNGER OPPONENTS LAUGH SO HARD THEY BEG FOR MERCY.” Barrie explained. “FOR SCOTT OR KAI TO WIN, THEY HAVE TO GO THE FULL SIXTY SECONDS WITHOUT SURRENDERING OR LEAVING THE CHALLENGE AREA. EVERYBODY UNDERSTAND?”
All four boys offered nods in the affirmative, though Scott couldn’t help but notice the blank look on Kai’s face as he did so. Torture was rare in corporate spycraft, and as such the Hawaiian agent for hire almost certainly had no formal training to counter it. Going into the contest with no experiential advantage, Kai would be at the mercy of his young body’s natural tickle resistance – and if the dread apparent in his overwhelmed expression was any indication, there may not have been much resistance to speak of.
“ALRIGHT THEN – HERE’S OUR FIRST MATCHUP!” Jackson and Kai’s names rose to the center of the screen. “JACKSON, KAI! PLEASE TAKE POSITION IN THE CENTER OF THE LIVING ROOM AND WAIT FOR THE WHISTLE.”
Ernesto and Scott stepped away as their fellow contestants positioned themselves a few feet from one another, Kai warily eyeing Jackson while the bigger boy cheerfully stretched out his lanky adolescent limbs. Sixty seconds appeared on the timer as Scott looked on in intensely conflicted anticipation, genuinely unsure of what result he wanted for the crush that hated his guts.
“AND…GO!”
Jackson leapt at his opponent but the smaller boy was one step ahead, hopping backwards just in time to evade the grabbing hands of the thirteen-year-old. As he dodged, Kai’s eyes glowed a brilliant amber in a show of determination that made Scott shiver, made him remember that there was very much still a proud grown man hidden within that slightly chubby four foot two frame. Jackson was smart about his physical superiority, however, using his head and shoulders height advantage to patiently pen Kai into a corner even as his minute quickly ticked away. Kai seemingly saw this strategy coming, however, as he tried to dive past Jackson just as he found himself backed up against the far wall. Stunned by the gambit, the bigger boy nearly let Kai slip away – but reacted just in time to grab his ankle, using that grip to easily pull the shouting eight-year-old to the ground.
“No!No!” Though Kai thrashed with surprising intensity, Jackson was undeterred as he grapevined the smaller boy’s leg and tightened his grip on the small, delicate, wriggling foot in his clutches. “Let me go! LET ME GOOOOO!!”
“Nothing personal, dude.” Jackson remarked with audible regret as he freed one hand to mercilessly tickle Kai’s baby-smooth, ultra-sensitive sole. The other two contestants reflexively clamped their hands over their ears as Kai’s howling laughter reverberated within the small room, Scott’s heart aching to realize that the tormented lad was indeed too ticklish to last against Jackson’s laser-focused attack. Though he had been caught with less than half the minute remaining, Kai’s defenses were melting away with horrifying speed against the endless giggles shaking his small form to its core. And while Scott was shaken by the suffering of his former friend, he nevertheless realized that he was absolutely pulling for Kai and fervently willed the poor boy to hang on a bit longer. There were only a few seconds left on the clock now, just bite your lip and hold out until…!
“I GIVE! I GIVE! UNCLE!”
Immediately released by Jackson upon surrender, Kai’s scrawny chest rose and fell as he gasped for air and stared up at the ceiling through eyes blurred with tears. It was a moment before he could compose himself enough to wipe those eyes with the back of his arm – to take a deep breath, sit up, and look at the screen.
00.10
A beat passed before Kai groaned and buried his face in his hands. In his daze, it didn’t immediately register that the timer read one-tenth of a second – if he’d held on for one-tenth of a second longer, he would’ve won. Now that fraction of an instant was going to cost him some horrible humiliation…or maybe even a couple more years.
“OHHHHH, WHAT A HEARTBREAKING RESULT!” Barrie cried as bursts of reactions filled the screen. “BUT THE CLOCK DOESN’T LIE, AND AFTER A HARD-FOUGHT BOUT WE’VE GOT OUR FIRST WINNER AND LOSER!”
“Sorry, bro.” Jackson offered as a numb Kai moved stiffly past him. The shell-shocked eight-year-old responded by silently plopping onto the couch and staring at the floor, looking numb to all that surrounded him. Though it made Scott shiver to see all that, for the moment he had to focus on his match – such as it was, since it wasn’t going to happen.
“ALL RIGHT – SCOTT, ERNESTO, YOU'RE UP!”
“So…” Scott asked as they stepped to the center of the living room. “Do you want to just do nothing while the minute passes, or…?”
“What are you talking about?” Ernesto’s eyes narrowed. “I’m not going to throw for you.”
“No, it isn’t throwing – you owe me a one on one victory, remember? Because I won that bet with the pizza?”
“Oh yeah.” Ernesto looked wistful for a moment. “Nah, I don’t think so.”
“What?”
“I’m not gonna honor the bet.” The eleven-year-old smirked and shrugged. “Do something about it.”
“But – but…” Scott sputtered, turning red as he spun to the screen. “Barrie, can’t you hold him to what he promised?”
“’FRAID NOT, KIDDO.” Barrie tutted. “THAT WAS A WAGER CONDUCTED BETWEEN YOURSELF AND ERNESTO. LYING MIGHT COST HIM SOME POPULARITY POINTS, BUT OTHERWISE IT’S OUT OF OUR HANDS. IF YOU WANT TO GET REVENGE, LAST FOR A MINUTE STARTING…NOW!”