There's a little shop near the seaside. It's a bit out of the way. It's a cold and stormy day. It's not tourist season, that's for sure.
Dr. Cambio is a traveling doctor. He was originally from some South American country. Many people think he's a quite handsome older man. He pops up here and there in out of the way places. Right now, he's the town's local shrink. A doctor of psychiatry, he has pills for what ails you.
Dr. Cambio has some unusual methods. He can swap people's bodies, and he did that for a while. It provided him with much needed research. If you're wondering how he gets his techniques, he'll tell you it's a trade secret. Lately, the good doctor has been experimenting with personality in a pill.
Tired of being a wimp who everyone treats as a doorman? Why not take a pill and become a new man? You will become that new man as long as you take the pills. Stop taking them and you revert back to your old milquetoast personality. Just remember that these pills only give you the mindset of the personality that you are imbibing. They don't actually give you a job or a new life. There are physical changes that may occur as your new personality takes over. Subtle at first, they change your body only over time.
Usually facial changes occur so you "look" the part of your new personality, but these changes are not instantaneous and take 6 - 10 months to fully form. Full physical changes require at least a year to complete. If you do not wish full physical changes to occur, discontinue usage of these medications as the effects cannot be reversed. ALL PHYSICAL CHANGES ARE IRREVERSIBLE. Weigh the options carefully before you decide to experiment with the following medications.
WARNING: ANY MINORS UNDER THE AGE OF 18 TAKING THESE PRODUCTS CAN EXPECT AGE PROGRESSION ON TOP OF OTHER PHYSICAL SIDE EFFECTS
Some of Dr. Cambio's Emporium of Wonderful Tonics include:
"Inner Policeman" Do you want to believe in order? Do you want what it takes to become a police officer? With nerves of steel, you'll gain instant skills in deduction and sharpshooting. Your instant ability to handle a gun, sniff out perps, and act calm while ordering civilians around will come in handy. These handy dandy little blue pills are just the ticket if you want to join the force. A love for law and order is inevitable. A disgust for protestors and the left in general is likely to occur.
Physical changes: increased muscle mass, height increase, sharper eyesight, strong jaw, racial change to Caucasian
"Bikerall" Do you wish you could say fuck off to authority figures and the life of the common everyday citizen? Do you crave the freedom of the open road? Bikerol pills promise to make you into a fearless, anti authoritarian "don't fuck with me" biker complete with a strong desire to join a biker gang and hang out in biker bars. Your automatic knowledge of motorcycle repair and riding skills will not give you a motorcycle but they will make you look and act the part. Your taste in clothing will automatically shift to biker gear and you won't be able to stand a normal life anymore.
Physical changes: increased fat and muscle mass, increased hairiness and fast beard growth, nicotine cravings, high tolerance for alcohol
"Conservatrol" - Do you wish you could be a conservative but your wimpy liberal values keep you from joining the much more masculine, arrogant, and entitled team of winners? Look no further. With Conservatrol, you will become extremely patriotic with these red and white pills, and you'll never vote blue so long as you take them. You will become pro military, pro Trump, and your MAGA hat will be just a click away! And if that wasn't enough, you'll also get a bonus of holier than thou God fearing warrior for Christ mentality running through your veins.
Warning: Any homosexual that takes Conservatrol will become temporarily straight. So if you knock up some young woman your first time out, don't come crying to your boyfriend about it later. Use protection when you bang your first pussy, bud.
Physical changes: increased muscle mass, height increase, sharper eyesight, strong jaw, non Caucasians will become Caucasian, attractiveness will increase to a level 10/10. You will look the part of an Alpha male.
"Ruloverall" - Are you tired of being poor? Wish you had that killer business instinct? With Ruloverall, you'll get that killer instinct. Of course, you won't give a fuck about who you step on as you make your ascent. Other people will just seem totally beneath you. Your business acumen for numbers and figures will give you an instant advantage, as well as a sheer ruthlessness required to rule over the hordes of losers and underlings who deserve to be beneath you. This navy blue pill will, much like a good suit, make you feel perfectly at home amongst men of privilege. You will feel inherently that you deserve to be among them. You will find your wardrobe disgusting unless you already dress up formally. Dress shirts, ties, suits and dress shoes will become necessary to your sanity. Fuck everyone else. You need to make money and lots of it so you can control as much as you can! Fuck charity. Fuck the poor. Fuck anyone who gets in your way!
Physical changes: increased muscle mass, height increase, 10/10 attractiveness Alpha factor, strong jaw
"Bullyuppers" Want to be more aggressive. Want to get a thrill out of being a thug who likes to beat up smaller boys and men? Look no further than Bullyuppers! these are essentially "Jock Up" pills for those that wish to become sports minded athletic fanatics that look down on weaker men. Much like the narcissism of Conservatrol and Ruloverall, Bullyuppers kick the notch of aggression up but make the user enjoy sadistic violence. Casually beating up men that look at you the wrong way will be entirely justifiable. You will come across as slightly sociopathic because that's exactly what you will be. Want a job as a bouncer or hired thug? Want instant fighting skills? You'll have the soul of an MMA fighter, the street smarts of a tough thug, a love of fighting in general, and you won't really have a problem with committing crimes. Why should anyone tell YOU what to do? Other men exist to serve you. Increased intimidation factor guaranteed! Tired of being bullied and want to turn the tables? You'll be doing that and more. Hell, why not throw the table through the window?? You will also have an insatiable desire to play and win at sports if you are in high school or college, especially football. Automatic knowledge of football, baseball and basketball are part of the Bullyuppers designed package.
Warning: Homosexual men that take Bullyuppers will face a 30% risk of losing their sexuality permanently. Bisexuality is a common side effect. 30% of users become permanently straight. Another 25% become permanently bisexual with the remaining gay patients becoming homosexual sadists.
Physical changes: increased muscle mass, height increase, sharper eyesight, strong jaw, nicotine addiction, high tolerance for alcohol, 10/10 attractivenss Alpha factor
Who is Dr. Cambio's first patient and what pill will they choose to take? Keep in mind that Dr. Cambio likes to leave his clients with cheap and generous amounts of miracle products.