“Okay, what will it be?” The receptionist looked at them curiously. Roxanne was short and scrawny, wearing a Star Wars shirt draped over her bony frame. She was wearing glasses, and her short, messy hair was a dirty blonde with long bangs that kept falling over one eye. Oscar was twice her size and chubby, wearing a Star Trek shirt. He also had glasses, and his brown hair was buzzed short.
“A whale”, said Roxanne with a big smile, brushing bangs away from her eye.
“Okay…” That was an uncommon request, but the receptionist had seen them all. Of course, she’s have to warn them of the limitations - they wouldn’t be able to give them the injection here, after all. “What species?”
“Blue whale. The biggest one”. Roxanne thought for a moment. “Make it male too”. She glanced slyly at Oscar, who was blushing bright red.
“I see. I assume you have a means to get to the sea? Perhaps a boat even?”
“We do”.
“Alright. And for you?”
“Sardine”, said Oscar, choking up a bit with excitement.
This time the receptionist paused. It was clear what the intention was. “O…. Kay…” she said slowly. “And you are… familiar with the unpredictable effects that, uh, your intentions have”.
“We are”. They held hands tightly.
“Alright, well, it’s your decision to make. If you’ll please head this way?”
The attendant seated them and took blood samples from each. She then went into the lab and re-emerged with two vials.
“Here you go. They’re clearly marked, but they’re also keyed to your DNA so if anyone other than you drinks one or if you drink the wrong one, nothing will happen. Just be sure to be in or near a suitable body of water. We take no responsibility for what would happen if you turn into aquatic animals away from water. Or really big animals in inappropriate places”.
“We understand”, said Roxanne brightly.
“Nor do we take responsibility for what happens after one of you gets eaten”.
“Got it”, said Oscar with a smile.
“Alright, good luck”.
The attendant sighed as the overjoyed couple skipped off. Oh well. None of my business, really.