"You aren't even fit to be human, James. So from now on, you can be an animal"
James looked at the text in bemusement. He had no idea what that was even supposed to mean. He had recently split from his girlfriend Rebecca who had always been a little eccentric. Maybe a little crazy even, which was part of the reason he had decided to end things with her over text. They hadn't exactly been together for long and it was just one bizarre thing after another. The latest was when they had been out the previous night and she had claimed to be a witch. And not as in the pagan, hippy kind. She seemed to think she was the kind that rode around on broomsticks zapping people into frogs. It was too much. It would be embarrassing if she had said any of that shit in front of his friends, and he could hardly pretend to believe it, so he instead decided to end things.
His phone buzzed again. It seemed there was more from Rebecca.