No matter how the head doctor phrased the question, Jon wouldn't admit outload he wanted to be a girl. Inside, despite his internal arguments against such things, his mind practically screamed he was one. And his mannerisms, including how he spoke, walked and sat, among other things, confirmed this, no matter what he tried to do to either stop it or hide it better.
"You seem distracted today," Dr Deks commented as she wrote something down, and Jon wondered how to respond to this, as he still didn't have any idea of why his mind suddenly had shifted so he understood being a girl better than being a boy, nor why he suddenly had an interest and acute knowledge of girl's clothes.
A shrug, and he wondered where to begin in explaining why he was distracted. Thinking about the latest development, he considered the underwear he was wearing, a consent between the Parkers and him, with them explaining if this was what he wanted, he should start simple, explore his options. This had led them to purchasing for him several pairs of girl's briefs called boyshorts, which Mrs Parker assured him was a good place for him to start. Not wanting to wear them, he tried to ignore them, but found it difficult, especially knowing they were available, and in the end, he'd given in, discovering in the process not only were the soft, cotton garments comfortable to wear, especially when he tucked his equipment back, but it helped somewhat alleviate the pressing need to wear other things meant for a girl.
Of course, the one thing this hadn't stopped were the dreams. No stranger to dreams about having sex and being nude in public, he found the latest ones upsetting, as lately, when he dreamt of being naked, he was very much female. And when he dreamed of having sex, they were really vivid, realistic, and it wasn't with a girl, but with a guy. And what made this even more upsetting wasn't he was being plugged up the butthole, but he was either on his back or sitting so he was straddling the other person. Able to smell their masculine scent, feel their course male skin, the areas covered in hair, Jon was also aware of how he had boobs, cupped in each of the guy's hands, how certain areas of his body were more sensitive to touch, whilst something long and hard poked and rubbed at the area between Jon's legs. Most of the dreams reached the point where he felt himself grow moist down there, at which time the other's dick would penetrate him in an area he was certain he didn't have, leading to Jon expressing himself in a series of very girlish gasps, moans and other sounds of pleasure.
"Are you doing your exercises?" Dr Deks asked him, and Jon wanted to tell her no, he wasn't, much in the same way he’d wanted to tell her he wouldn't, but instead he nodded.
Sometime after starting to see her, she had proposed Jon try some things. Printing off a few things, most them on ways to pass as a girl, all of which he wanted to first refuse, then tear up, Dr Deks had suggested he try at home these things and see how it felt and if any of it was something he wanted to pursue. Nearly all of the material was stuff he already did, such as squatting to pee, altering his patterns of speech, the way he sat, stood, and walked, but there was some stuff, like shifting the inflection and pitch in his voice to sound more like a girl, he wouldn't. Thinking about the stuff she called exercises, he wanted to cry out they weren't for him, he wasn't a girl, didn't want to be one, but couldn't bring himself to say such things out loud, mostly because they seemed contradictory.
His mind still circling the stuff she'd given him, suggested he try, Jon shrugged and commented, "A lot of it comes natural to me. And when I do other things, I dunno, it just seems right."
"What sort of other things," Dr Deks prompted.
Unsure how to explain what he'd tried, as well as he felt, he muttered, "I dunno. Like, wearing girl's clothes."
"Are you?"
Uncomfortable with the subject, wanting to change it, Jon replied after a bit, "Yeah. Mrs Parker bought me some stuff, like underwear at first, then some sleeper sets."
"And how do you feel about them? Do you find them comfortable, right to wear. Do you think they're cute? Make you feel pretty?"
Mind on the pyjama sets his foster mother had bought him, eight sets in total, all clearly showing they were meant for a girl, Jon considered how, like the underwear, he'd refused to wear them at first. But then, slipping on a pair, liking how soft and comfortable they were, he'd started to sleep more and more wearing them until they were all he wore. Looking up at Dr Deks, he said, "They're very pretty," inwardly cringing at his words as he further, "As well as being very comfortable to wear."
Dr Deks nodded at this, then, as she made a note on her pad of paper, circled back around to what she'd been trying to get him to answer for the past couple of sessions. "And when you wear them, you feel as if you are your correct sex and gender? That you aren't playing dress-up? That this is how you want to express yourself, because you are a girl?"
Back to the questions he didn't want to answer, scared as to how he'd reply, he tried to keep silent. But his mind and mouth rebelled, and before he could stop himself, he stated, "I am not playing dress-up."
With a smile, Dr Deks nodded, wrote something down, then explained, "We're making some good progress here, Jon. As I explained before, I want to make sure you understand what it is you're getting into, as well as make sure it's what you want. Most of my clients come in already expressing themselves. They do not suddenly one day start behaving and doing things what society considers normal for the opposite sex and gender. And this is something I believe we also need to get to the root of - why the sudden need to express yourself the way you are," and setting her pen and pad of paper aside, she stood, saying as she did, “I think we should call it for today.”
Jon, having already heard her tell and assure him of the reason why he'd come in to see her, wanted to scream he didn't know why he suddenly had an understanding of how to be girl, nor why he was so interested in stuff a girl would be into, or why his mannerism was more aligned to being one. Following Dr Deks lead, he barely paid any attention as she confirmed his next appointment in two days, allowed himself to be guided out of the office and towards the waiting room. Bidding her a good day, and thanking her when she said the same thing to him, Jon left as quick as he could, all whilst making it seem as if he wasn't. Unlocking his bike, he walked next to it for a bit, mulling over the current session and what he'd said toward the end.
Not happy with having told her he wasn't playing dress up, he wished he could take it back or said something else. "Or kept my trap shut," he muttered as he mounted his bike and began pedalling back to the foster home. Inside, he headed for the living room with the intent on continuing the video game he and Billy had started together. Seeing the only one home at the moment was Denise, and she was, as usual, futzing with the computer, he ignored her as he inserted the cartridge and clicked on the console.
Denise didn't think she could ask for a more perfect opportunity. Having gotten home moments ago from using the emitter on Billy, she'd just sat down and was in the process of deleting the teenager's profile when her foster brother came in. Pulling up Jon's profile, she wondered what she should do next, then decided she wanted to see how the timer function played out. Clicking on it, she set so it'd activate in about a month. Next, she pulled up information of Jon's face, and adjusted it so it had a more feminine appearance of a cute little nose, fullish lips, and smooth, soft skin, among other features, whilst, at the same time, she thinned his eyebrows and tied the whole into the timer she'd just set.
After she'd finished with this, she set to work increase her foster brother's hair length. Setting it so it'd take a month to grow out, she made sure it'd always take about the same amount of time to reach the same point, a little way past the middle of his back. Giving it more volume, thickness, she made sure it was like what a girl would have as she also included knowledge and interest in doing the hair into a plethora of different styles, as well as a love for keeping it long. Completing this, the final thing she did was to make sure any beard and moustache hairs he might have would regress and vanish fully, as well as any hair he had on his legs, chest, back, arms and underarms regress and disappear. Turning to his groin hair, she shifted the sex and gender on it, changing it so Jon would have a small, triangle-shaped swatch of soft, lightly colour fawn-shaded pubic hair. Going back over all she'd done, making sure the timer would activate once what she was thinking of as his hair transformation was done, she discovered in the process Jon's sexual orientation.
Set to him being attracted to guys, she frowned. Wondering if it had always been like this, or if it was a by-product of the tinkering she'd done, similar to how her foster brother didn't just have an understanding and liking of girl's clothes and fashion, but also wore girl's things, as she'd seen him a couple of times in his pyjamas. Not a hundred percent positive whether it was natural he was gay, or if the switch was because of the Chronivac, Denise left it alone. Saving the profile, she sent the new data to the remote, ejected it, made sure Jon was still distracted by his video game, aimed the device at him, and pressed the button to initiate the new changes.