You follow the little man out of the bushes. In the moonlight, you can see he's dressed in period piece green leprechaun outfit complete with breaches and waistcoat.
"Come along," he says waving his gloved hand, as he enters a building marked Reptile House. The sign by the door says "Closed", but he ignores it.
Curious, you follow silently. Well, mostly silently, you manage to trip and stumble a bit even though the ground is perfectly flat concrete. The little man chuckles.
Inside your eyes adjust to the darkness. The building is a hallway with glass windows on either side. In the first exhibit case you note a pile of clothing on the ground and a large python hanging from a log which is obliquely resting in the diorama.
"The dang Patrick drove all the snakes out of Ireland, and I miss those sweet slithery things," the leprechaun explained.
"Did it eat somebody?" you ask pointing.
"Heavens no. Least ways not yet. It does look a might hungry, doesn't she?"
"Oh, it's a she? How do you tell?" you ask straining to see.
"Cause a changed him into a female snake, just like she's becoming a male snake. They'll make a nice mating pair, don't you think?" the leprechaun points to the next case.
Inside you see, Pamela Sue writhing on the sandy floor. Her hair is falling out in clumps, and her skin is all leathery and patterned like the python in the next case. She looks at you or rather through you, as though you're not there. Perhaps she sees only her reflection in the glass. The case is illuminated, the hallway dark. Her eyes are snake eyes. A split tongue shoots from her mouth tasting the air.
"She'll be done soon enough, and then they can be together again," the leprechaun says turning away from the case to lead you down the hallway.
"You mean, Tom is the female snake?" Tom and Pam were always together, it seemed weird but okay that if they were both snakes they should be together anyway. After all this was all a hallucination anyway, you might as well enjoy it.
In the next enclosure, you see a group of latino kids. They look really hairy, and their clothing is way to big for them. You look closely and realize they aren't kids, but men or midgets.
"Seems these ruffians thought this would be a good vacant building to get high in," the leprechaun says sadly shaking his head, "But I'll teach the vermin a thing or two before my snakes are fed."
You open your mouth to ask what he meant by that, and then you notice the whiskers and tail on the smallest one. The gang bangers are turning into rats. You swallow hard. You want to say something, but if this guy is really a leprechaun, you don't want to end up as snake food.
"So you're filling the reptile house with snakes?" you ask.
"Oh, not just the reptile house," the little man says with glee rubbing his hands. "Every vacant cage, tank, pit, and enclosure in the zoo will be full before I'm through. Come along!"
He leads you passed a few more cases of snakes and back to the entrance. You pause by Tom's case, and wave, and whisper, "Sorry, Tom."
The leprechaun turns, and says, "You mayn't know this, but snakes are pretty deaf. But I'm sure the fellow could discern your sentiment from your actions. Now hurry up. I've got cages to fill before your partiers start going home."
He leads you up the concrete path. You trot after him like a faithful hound. He notices this behavior.