"...A pig? I'm going to be a pig?!" Jessica looked up at her mother horrified. "Oh my god... I can't believe it! I'm going to be a smelly, disgusting pig girl!" She burst into tears, running up the stairs wailing.
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"Oh, geez." Scott sighed. "Really, a pig? Could I not have gotten something a bit cooler? Damn." He walked through into his kitchen and lay the letter down on the table. "Oh well. I suppose this might be kinda cool... just sitting around in dirt all day naked, hehe."