"Right now I am in need of a full-grown oak tree to be the centerpeice of our research garden. And I think you'd be perfect for the position."
Ben stared. "A tree? Are you nuts? I'm a human, not a plant. Or is this some kind of costume thing?"
Boss smiled and shook his head. "Nope. I am talking about being a real tree. Just temporarily. We'd want to take cuttings, of course, and harvest acorns. You see, you would be a new strain of genetically enhanced Oak, highly resistant to most plant diseases, quick growing, and designed to have even branches and thick leaf cover. Plants grown from your acorns would be able to reforest a burned area with grown trees in just a couple of years. Homeowners could have full-grown trees where there was just bare ground while they were young enough to enjoy them."
"How could you possibly make me into a tree - even temporarily?" Ben was bewildered by this - was the guy serious or was htis a joke?
"Very simpley." Boss picked up a remote control and turned on an overhead projector that shot video of a teenage boy sitting on a table. Ben noted that the room looked a lot like this one. The boy was rubbing his arm.
The boy said "So, how long does it take for all this stuff to kick in?"
Ben squinted at the projected video. The boy's skin seemed to be getting darker. A voice off camera that sounded like the Boss said "It's already started."
"Huh?" The boy looked at himself and then gasped as he saw his skin go from tan to brown to nearly black in seconds. "Whoa! This is wild!"
As Ben watched, the boy started shrinking rapidly, his fingers drawing in and face pushing out. He started looking scared. "Hey, this is way faster than I..." His voice caught and words suddenly changed into bleeting sounds. Sliding off the table, he staggered and fell forward, catching himself with.. cloven hooves. Black hair spread like wildfire over his skin, and in another minute the video showed a large black goat that shook off the boy''s clothing and then started shewing on a sock.
"One of our first efforts." Boss turned off the video. "Much easier to do mammal to mammal, of course. He became the sire of a new herd of an endangered species of mountian goat. Still keeping the nannies pregnant and having a great time."
Ben tried to figure out how the video could have been faked. It looked pretty real. "He's still a goat?"
Boss nodded. "Yep. He's been offered the chance to be human again, but he just bleats and finds another nanny to screw."
"But that's a goat, an animal. You want to turn me into a plant!"
Boss nodded again. "For a base contract of five years, with payment of $50,000 per year tax-free and renewable indefinately. Remember, as a tree, you'd be able to save everything. After 5 years, you'd have the option to be restored to your current age and appearance, and have $250,000 to start off with."
He walked over to a cabinet and pulled out a shiny gun-like object. In the hande was a glass tube holding dark green liquid. "This is a pnuematic hypo. If you agree, I will start the process now. If you choose not to accept, this intereview is over and you can leave."