"Hey... hey Tom. Hey It's Mark. Good man, how are you? You ready for your trip? Good. Hey, that's what I'm actually calling about. No no... no, I'm not bailing, don't worry. I wouldn't do that to you guys. But hey, I am going to be late. Yeah, I can't make it out Friday night, so is it okay if I'm there first thing in the morning Saturday? What's that? Yea... I know man, when do you get back Monday? I could stay late and we could hang out then maybe? Yeah, we'll see. Hope this isn't too much of a bother. Okay, note by the fridge, got it. See you Monday then. Bye. Sir".
Mark really hadn't meant to be late, but sometimes having a flexible work schedule was more of a pain than anything else. At least it was over and he could enjoy the rest of his weekend. He hoped that Tom and Jeff had left clear enough instructions, but then again, how hard could it be to take care of a couple of dogs?
Mark pulled into the driveway and got out of his car. His stuff could wait, he wanted to check the place out. He found the key in the hiding place where they had said it would be, and went to unlock the door. He paused, noticing the commotion on the other side of the door. "Greeeat, big dogs" he sighed. He heard a bark, though not a hostile one by any means. Mark braced, took a deep breath and opened the door. Immediately he was greeted by paws on his shoulders and a barrage of licks to his face.
"Haha! Whoa! Easy! Down! Heel! Jesus Christ!!" Mark laughed, pushing the dog down off of him. In front of him sat two full blooded German Shepherds, one slightly bigger than the other. He noted that he had only been "welcomed by the bigger shepherd, while the smaller one sat calmly by, acting almost... amused? "Haha, both male, go figure" Mark laughed to himself. "And whoa, someone is glad to see me!" The larger shepherd's penis was about halfway erect, sticking out of his sheath. The larger dog barked, and it almost looked like he was smiling. "I must be losing it... it's like you can understand me or something" Mark said. "Well, let's find this note so I find out how to take care of you guys, shall we?" He said as he between the two, giving both a good scratch behind the ear. "I hope you both don't mind... but I doubt I'll be wearing many clothes this weekend" he said with a smile. When both dogs barked he stopped in his tracks and looked back at them. Now they both seemed to be "smiling". Mark could only laugh to himself, shrugged it off and continued to the kitchen.
"Aha, here we go" Mark said aloud as he picked up the note. The shepherds looked on intently.
Mark,
We like to eat two or three times a day, whatever you're having will be fine; just make enough for us.
"Ha! You're kidding me! They wrote this from the dog's perspective!" Mark mused aloud.
We should need to go out around 4 times a day, but don't worry, we'll let you know when. We both sleep on the bed, you're welcome to join us if you like. Other than that, we'll make sure you have a good time. If you have any questions, just ask! We look forward to our weekend with you!
Signed,
Jazz and Titus.
"Seriously? These are my instructions? This has to be a joke!" Mark said aloud. Both dogs barked. "Huh... gonna be an interesting weekend I guess".