Jon walked into the old Chinatown ointment store. The seventeen year old was desperate for he needed a gift for his girlfriend, in celebration of their one-year anniversary. Jon himself did not care too much about the event, but he did like the idea that he could get laid in exchange for making her happy. Unfortunately, his girlfriend, Sally, was from a wealthy family, so she already had everything she needed; from the latest fashions to the newest gadgets to the best, well, everyting she wanted. He couldn’t giver her jewelry because she had a diamond necklace, he couldn’t give her a teddy bear because she had twenty too many, and he couldn’t even giver her a box of chocolates because she sort of has a minor eating disorder, so she’d simply throw them away. All that he was left with was ointments. Girls like smelly stuff, right? Jon thought to himself.
As he walked in, he was greeted by an elderly Chinese man, who looked as if he came right out of a kung-fu movie. He had the thick, rounded glasses, a white silky beard longer than some bikers’ beards, and he walked with an old walking stick. He said something to Jon, but it was obvious that he wasn’t great at speaking English. The few words that he did say that were vaguely understandable also had a very noticeable Chinese accent to them. What Jon could make of it, however, he assumed that the man encouraged him to look around, or something rather. Jon looked around the small shop until he found a sign above a small shelf with the words “Sexual Satisfactory Enhancement” written underneath the Chinese characters. He looked at the vials, happy that for once he managed to buy a good gift for someone he loved. The first row had the following vials, written in both Chinese and English:
Passionate Pastures (with a cattle insignia)
Hey Lovers (with a horse insignia)
Mud Loving (with a pig insignia)
Sex Bray (with a donkey insignia)
Unleashed Desires (with a dog insignia)
Jungle Times (with a lion insignia)
Burly Bonding (with a bear insignia)
Which one did Jon pick?