The door to the bathroom swung open, and the janitor stomped in. He'd forgotten the plunger. Well, he'd left it to dry, but now it was needed again, so he had to stomp halfway across campus, well just down two floors. Why didn't the university simply buy a plunger for each bathroom. It would make his life simpler. He frowned the plunger wasn't where he left it. Water sloshed in the next bathroom stall.
"...you'll be my ideal roommate. Otherwise..." threatened a young man's voice.
The janitor pushed the stall door open expecting to find a nerd getting a swirly. Instead he found Josh using the plunger that you've become.
"Hey, what're you doing with my plunger?" demands the janitor.
"Uh, oh, I was just clearing a clog, sir. Actually, doing your job for you," Josh snapped back waving the wet plunger at the janitor.
The janitor glared. "I see you consider a plumber's helper your ideal roommate because...?"
"Oh, that. Well, I just had a fight with my room mate, and well, I was sort of taking it out on the clog. I mean if you saw my roommate you'd understand. He's a big dumb jock, who leaves his dirty underwear, socks and jockstraps everywhere, and he always reeks of cigarette smoke."
"I'm not a counselor or an R.A., so don't complain to me about your roommate. Now hand me that plunger, the boys on the third floor had a bean burrito eating contest, and the plumbing lost. Six stopped up toilets on the third floor. Now hand it over!"
"Ew! Yeech, I guess you need it more than I do. The clog here's all cleaned up," Josh said handing you to the janitor.
He thought at you, *Too bad only a telepath can read your thoughts, I imagine after clearing all those toilets, you'll be more receptive to my offer to make you my ideal roommate.*
The janitor's calloused hand closed around you. He stalked offer muttering about the weird types a magical college attracted. He also questioned why in a place filled with powerful wizards, they couldn't magically clear out their pipes without having him use a plunger and do it by hand.
"Mr. Brown," snapped four-legged Professor Twobottoms as he passed the janitor in the hallway, "we don't clear the drains for the very simple reason that if we did the residual magic might build up in the sewers, and heaven knows what might accidentally be conjured up. There's a basis to all those rumors about monsters in the sewers of New York. Too many lazy wizards clearing foul stoppages with magic eventually created foul magical monsters. Uh, what's that about Josh's roommate wanting to be a plumber's apprentice? Oh, sorry I accidentally read your mind. Have to concentrate not to read minds. Bad habit, I do it when I'm thinking about other things. Didn't mean to intrude on your thoughts. Won't happen again."
The janitor Mr. Brown cringed slightly at the thought of magical monsters lurking in the drain pipes. They didn't pay him enough sometimes to do this job. Still if he didn't do it, some lazy wizard probably would, and then where'd they be. Professor Twobottoms might be clarevoyant or telepsychopathic or whatever, but he must've got Brown's thoughts jumbled up as regarded the plumber's helper in his hand. Perhaps Twobottoms had seen the image in Brown's mind and recognized Josh, if that's really what the guy in the bathroom was named.
You could just scream, you're sure Twobottom heard your thoughts regarding your roommate Josh, or maybe he heard both your thoughts and the janitors and six toilets! You'd shudder if you could.
Twobottoms paused as he closed the door to the Faculty Lounge behind himself. "Note to self, be careful around Mr. Brown, he's definitely got multiple personality disorder. Still as long as he does his job, and isn't an axe wielding maniac, I suppose I shouldn't mind. It actually makes him a bit more interesting. Oh, somebody brought donuts!" The incident with the janitor and the plunger was relegated to an unswept corner of the professor's cluttered mind as he grabbed a jelly filled donut.
SLOSH! I hate Josh.
FLUSH. I really loathe Josh.
"There. That's the last toilet. Now to rinse you off, and stow you back in my janitor's closet, so I can get some rest," Mr. Brown said wiping his brow with a handkerchief, and rinsing you off in a convenient sink. Then he wiped up the splattered water, and shoved your hard rod under his armpit.
He paused in the doorway, and sighed, "Ach, it's that crazy student. He's probably waiting by the elevators just to try to get his hands on my plunger again. I'll show him. I'll take the stairs down."
Josh was talking with Andy about the burrito eating contest, and didn't see Mr. Brown disappear down the far stairwell.
The door to the janitor's closet was flung open, and you were tossed in you. You fell over on your side and rolled around on the floor. You are damp and shivering when you finally regain your human form. You shiver at your nakedness, and pull the overhead cord to turn on the light. It'll be good to get back in your clothes, and maybe smoke a cigarette. On second thought forget the cigarettes they're boobytrapped. You search the closet, your clothes are gone. Darn that Josh, he must have taken them. Of course, he had probably come to the janitor's closet first looking for you. Then not finding you there. He traced you to the first floor bathrooms. You reach for the door knob and frown. First, you're still naked. Second, there's no knob on the inside, just a smooth metal faceplate. You'll have to wait for someone to open the door, but whoever does that will be looking for something. You see black foil square slide under the door.
A voice shouts, "Hey, give me back my condom. I've got a hot date later!"
Oh, no! You try to reach for the condom to slide it back under the door before the handle turns. Click, you're too late the spell is already working.