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A Diet Dr. Pepper Commercial dressed as a Dr Pepper Employee

added 13 years ago BM O

He's in some sort of community center sitting with a bunch of weirdos
in a circle of chairs. One guy is dressed as Santa Claus, another
looks like a giant rabbit, and there's a tooth fairy too. Jack looks
down at his clothes. He's dressed in a Dr. Pepper jumpsuit with his
name "Jack" embroidered on the suit under the Dr. Pepper patch.

"Right, you expect us to believe that this stuff has zero calories?"
says Santa Claus taking a sip, "No way this stuff is zero calories. I
don't believe it!"

"Uh, okay, so why should I care what you believe, Santa Claus? You're
make believe," Jack says.

Santa belts him, "How's that for make believe?"

"Okay, so you're a real guy dressed up in a Santa Suit, but there's no
such thing as a real Santa Claus, Tooth Fairy or Easter Bunny. They're
just people in costumes."

"Gentlemen, gentlemen, need I remind you that you're here for therapy.
And denial is a river in Egypt, not a way of coping," says a Sigmund
Freud look-alike. "Now let me try some of this Diet Dr Pepper."

"Here's a fresh glass for you," said Santa extracting a glass from his
burlap sack. He reaches toward Jack and pull at the tap sticking out
of Jack's abdomen and fills the glass with bubbly brown liquid.

"WTF? I'm a Dr. Pepper dispenser?"

"You are the personafication of Diet Dr. Pepper, unless you are able
to convince people you exist you will fade away into nothingness."


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