"Oof! WTF, I just flattened this guy!" said Jay standing up and
looking at the Varsity player lying on the grass.
Chad Marshall was the Varsity Quarterback - emphasis on the "was." He
was now a flat cut-out version of himself with his football gear and
clothing still covering his now 2D body. He didn't know what had
happened. He'd been skirmishing with one of the JV players, Jay
something or other, and now he couldn't move, breathe or speak. He'd
thought he had broken his neck until Jay reached down and stood him
up. Then he realized it was much worse. His helmet lay on the ground
with the chin strap still buckled and the mouth guard dangling there.
Rod came over and clapped Jay on the shoulder, "Looks like you knocked
the air completely out of him."
"I -uh- didn't mean to - I mean not like this. This is impossible,
isn't it?"
"Well, if I were you, I'd get him out of those clothes and roll him up
and stuff him in your gym bag before the rest of the Varsity team gets
here. Chad will look great pasted to your wall, don't you think?"
"Uh, haha, yeah, he's grade A jock off material, but I mean what
happened to him?"
"Oh, he drank some of the "Varsity Only Gatorade"," said Rod with a
chuckle using air quotes when he said "Varsity Only Gatorade." That's
what their red cooler of sports drink was labelled. JV had a yellow
cooler labeled simply "JV".
"He drank Gatorade?"
"No, stupid. I laced their Gatorade with something my roomie was
working on his physics or chemistry lab - some science lab. Anyway, if
somebody drinks it and gets hit with 50 lbs of pressure or more within
2 hours of ingestion, they end up like Chad the flat lad here. No need
to be gentle. It's not like he is in a position to complain."
Rod said reaching over to strip off Chad's Jersey and pads. Jay tugged
at the football pants laces and the pants slid down his flattened
legs. Then he laid Chad back down on the ground rolling him up socks,
jockstrap and all.
"Hey, you forgot to remove his jock and socks."
"No, I didn't," said Jay with a wink. "I really do like that
expression on his face. You're really going to turn the entire Varsity
team into poster boys?"
"Why not? They lost the their last game and it's the first time we
haven't been in the finals in over 30 years. Besides - well, I'll
tell you later. Let's get this gear off the field and get Jay in your
duffel, here come our poster boys."