You wake up to someone knocking on your door. At first, you don't know where you
are, but you quickly remember that you're in your room. That dream had seemed so
real but you know that you aren't a grownup, and you're definitely not a boy. You look
around your room just to confirm that you are you. Your room is that of a typical seven
year old girl. You have a four poster bed with pink lace curtains, a pink and violet
dresser, and a pink toy chest with "Princess" and your name written on it in violet
letters. There are posters of Hannah Montana on the pink walls, and a walk-in closet
which you know holds all of your pretty dresses and shoes.
There is another knock on your door, and this time you hear your mommy say sweetly,
"Time to get up, Violet. Remember, we're going to the water park today, and Daddy
wants to get going soon."
"I'm up, Mommy," you say, and immediately think that your voice is different.
"Get ready to go, then. Put on your swimsuit under your dress."
"Okay, Mommy." Once again you think that your voice is strange, but you know it's not.
If it was, your mommy would have said something.
"And don't forget to brush your teeth, princess."
"I won't, Mommy," you say, smiling at the pet name. You still think that your voice
sounds strange, but you're still a little sleepy so it must be your imagination. That's
what your mommy would say.
You get out of bed. Most days you have to use the potty right away, but you don't feel
the need today. You think maybe you're growing up! Mommy would be proud. Still, you
go into the bathroom and brush your teeth, just like Mommy told you to. You know it
makes her happy when you do what she tells you.
You go back to your room and open the drawer that has your swimsuits in it. You're in
a pink mood today, so you pick out a pink one-piece with a big red heart outlined in
gold glitter. Next you go to your closet to pick out your dress. The one you pick is a
pink short sleeve with ruffles on the hem and sleeves. You bend down to a shelf and
pick up a pair of pink sandals, then you take all the items of clothing and place them
on your bed.
You take off your nightgown and then your Disney princess panties, but you stop when
you see your private part. For some reason, you think that there should be something
down there, but you can't think of what that would be. You simply have this feeling that
it shouldn't be as flat as it is. You wonder where these feelings are coming from. You
decide to ignore them and finish getting ready.
You put on your swimsuit, then your dress, and slip on your sandals. You pick up your
nightgown and panties and throw them down the clothes chute on your way out of
your bedroom.
You go downstairs and see your daddy in the living room. He looks up briefly from his
newspaper as you enter and says, "Good morning, princess."
"Good morning, Daddy." you said. Then you decide to tell him about your dream.
"Daddy, I had a strange dream."
"Really? What was it about?"
"Well, I was-" You stop as you feel a warm sensation around your private part. You
look down, and your fears are confirmed. You're wetting yourself, something that you
haven't done since before you turned seven a few days ago - no, longer than that, a
deep part of you says. And you didn't even think you had to go! In panic, you press a
hand against the stream to try to hold it in, but you only succeed in getting both your
dress and your hand soaked.
Your daddy is still engrossed in his newspaper, and hasn't seen anything. "You were
what, pumpkin?"
The stain on your pretty pink dress grows, and you feel your pee start to run down
your legs and onto the tiled floor. Not knowing what to do, you start to cry. "Daddy..."
you say in a small voice.
He looks up from his paper and, noticing your predicament, jumps up. "Oh honey, it's
okay," he says soothingly as he bends down and gives you a hug, careful not to get
your accident on him. "Things like this happen sometimes."
You stand there sniffling as your pee starts to cool uncomfortably against your skin
and in your sandals. Your daddy calls your mommy downstairs, and she comes and
takes you by the hand, leading you back up to your bedroom and whispering
reassurances all the way. You know that you are much too old to be having accidents,
and you try to say sorry, but your mommy hushes you. "It happens sometimes, honey,
and it's not anybody's fault. Let's just get you cleaned up," she says, and you know
that it happens, even to girls your age, but you can't help feeling a great deal of
shame, like you're a much bigger person who did the same thing.
She fetches a towel from your bathroom and has you stand on it. She removes your
sandals and lifts your dress over your head, then carefully peels off your soaked one-
piece. "Did you go potty this morning?" she asks.
You shamefacedly shake your head 'no.' "I didn't think I had to go at all," you say
quietly.
"Well," your mommy says, "how about we make a deal? Let's say that from now on,
when you wake up in the morning, you go sit on the potty, even if you think you don't
need to go. If you just try, I think we can avoid doing this again. What do you think?"
You nod, even though you think it's a rule a toddler would have, and not a seven year
old. Your mommy smiles, satisfied, then takes the wet clothes and the towel, and
throws them down the laundry chute, then takes you into the bathroom to give you a
quick bath. Baths are always fun, and you start to smile again as your mommy
splashes you playfully.
When the bath is done, your mommy dries you off with another towel, and hands you a
new one-piece swimsuit and a dress to wear over it. Both are yellow, a color you
would not have chosen for yourself, but you take them anyway and start to put on the
swimsuit. Your mommy stops you.
"There's one more thing." She reaches under the bathroom cabinet and pulls out a
package of your old Little Swimmers from when you were five or so and still having a
few accidents. You're horrified. "But Mommy-"
She puts a finger to your lips. "I know. But it's just in case. You don't want another
accident to stop you from having fun today, do you?"
You try to protest again, but she gives you the "Mommy look," and you know you have
to comply. She takes a diaper out of the package and hands it to you. You put it on,
surprised that it still mostly fits after two whole years.
Your mommy looks at you appraisingly, and digs in the package once more. She
hands you another diaper. "I don't think one would be enough if you have an accident.
Try putting this one on over the other."
You obey somewhat sullenly, and Mommy nods approvingly. You look down to see
Ariel, the Little Mermaid, smiling serenely up at you, and you can't help but feel a little
babyish. You put on your swimsuit, feeling an unusual stretch over the diapers.
Curious, you climb your stepstool to the counter to see how you look in the mirror. The
extra padding pushes your legs out and makes the climb a little awkward, requiring
you to use your hands as well as feet (like a baby, you think) to get up the short steps.
You can tell there's enough of a bulge around your middle to indicate you're wearing
diapers, and you hope no one looks hard enough to notice. You see your mommy
smiling slightly at you. The attention embarrasses you somewhat, and you briefly
consider asking to stay home today, but the allure of the water park is too great, and
you hop down off the stool to finish dressing.
You and your mommy head back downstairs, you going first in anticipation of the day,
the incident if the morning somewhat forgotten, though you still feel the extra bulk
between your legs. She follows behind you, dressed in her bathing suit under normal
clothing and carrying a few extra swim diapers to pack in the day bags waiting
downstairs.
Daddy is now dressed in his swimwear as well, and as you enter the living room he
packs the last few items into day bags. He smiles as you run up to him and gives you
a big hug.
"Hey sweetheart, are you feeling better?" he asks. You nod and give him a smile back.
"That's the spirit," he says, kissing your forehead. His slight stubble tickles your face,
making you giggle.
"Want to help me take these bags out to the car?" You take a bag with your sunscreen
and towel and a few other things, and a bag of snacks, and follow your daddy outside
to the SUV your family had bought just a couple weeks before.
As you help him put the bags in the trunk, he asks, "So what were you going to tell me
earlier about a dream you had?"
You've almost forgotten, and as it is, you have to think for a moment to remember
anything coherent. "I think... It was that I was like you, Daddy. I was big and a boy."
Your daddy chuckles and says "That's certainly a strange dream."
"Yeah, but it seemed real."
Your daddy chuckles again and says "I know that some dreams may seem real but
they're not. Sometimes they can seem so real that you don't know where you are when
you wake up."
"That's what happened to me. I think that my voice sounds strange and there's
suppose to be something in my private area."
"That must have been some dream. I'm going to tell you something that I haven't told
anyone before. A couple years ago I had a dream where I was a little girl. It seemed
so real to me that for the rest of the day I kept thinking that my voice had changed,
that I shouldn't be so big, and that I should have a flat private area. There was even a
few times that I caught myself almost going into the little girl's room. But, you know
what? Those feelings went away that same day, and they will for you too, kiddo."
"Do you still remember that dream, Daddy?"
"I do, very clearly."
Your mommy comes out at that point, holding her cell phone, and says, "I have some
news for you, princess. Miley's going to be at the water park, too!"
You grin widely. "No way! Really??" She nods. "Yay! Miley's going!"
"Now Violet, just remember that she's not going as Hannah Montana," your mommy
says. "She's going there to relax and have fun, not to perform for anyone."
"Well, we should get going," your daddy says, opening the driver's door and getting
into the car. "We'll stop and get some breakfast on the way."
You sit in your booster seat and your mommy buckles you in. You know you need the
booster seat since you are only three feet, ten inches tall, rather small for a seven year
old. You are often mistaken for being much younger than you are, and you've been told
that you will need to use the booster seat until you're about twelve. Normally, you don't
give it any thought, but today you can't help but think that you shouldn't need it. Maybe
that feeling will go away today, like your daddy said his did. Your daddy starts the car
and you're on your way to the water park.