"Yesssuh? Come on in," you say, still surprised by your voice.
Cletus walks in, and you realize you must be in a bedroom at his house. "Well now, boy. I see you grew up a bit during the night. Welcome to your new life as a redneck." He hands you a plastic cup. "Here, I reckon you'll be needing this from now on."
You nod in appreciation and spit into the cup. "Yep. And thank you kindly, Cletus. I didn't know what I was missing all these years." You walk back to the mirror and really look at yourself this time. Your stomach bulges over your belt, and you notice the buckle, a Confederate flag, is huge, just as it should be. Gotta have it show under this gut, you think to yourself.
You like the look of your cowboy hat and your boots, which you somehow know are a size 13. But wait--didn't you use to wear a size 8? Your hand moves to the sizeable bulge beneath the buckle where your jeans are straining against your bigger cock. Heh, you think proudly. Big feet, big hands, big cock.
You're wearing a flannel shirt with the sleeves ripped off, and you can plainly see a thick bush of hair under your armpit. Come to think of it, you're hairier all over, with a tuft of dark swirls creeping out of the unbuttoned top of your shirt. After spitting again into your cup--damn, you think, this chaw sure is fine and you could get used to spitting black all the time--you bring your hand up and run it over your grizzled jaw. Just yesterday, you only had to shave once or week or so, but now it looks like you have a good two weeks' worth of unkempt dark growth on your face. Lifting your arm, you notice a stench coming from the mat of hair in your pit.
"Cletus, I sure could do with some more of that cologne. I reek worse than a horse that's been rode hard all day. I also think I need to take a razor to my face."
Cletus strokes his own beard and replies, "Naw, we don't got any razors 'round here. You're a redneck now, and you ain't got no need for one. I will get you some more of that fine cologne, though. You might want to loosen your britches a notch first. Afterward, we're going to school, and you can show everyone what you've become."