You stand naked before the mirror in your bedroom, staring at both your male genitals and your breasts, attempting to comes to a conclusion of which was right to have and whether you were in deed male, as the voice in your head suggested, or if you were female, as your believe.
Letting your eyes drift, you look at the purchases you made hours ago...the bras, the underwear, the dress and the bikini that you think you would look oh so cute in.
Turning away from the mirror, you pick up the dress and pressing against your face, you breath in the fresh, clean smell coming off it, liking the way it feels so soft against your cheek, thinking that you must make up your mind soon seeing as you must start to get ready to go out to dinner with your parents and grandparents.
Dropping the dress, you turn back to the mirror, thinking carefully. Finally, your mind settles on an answer, but you are not sure how to apply such a thought.
Laying down before your mirror, you adjust yourself, sit-up, draw the bean-bag chair you like to lay on ever so often closer and shifting your position, you lay on the chair before the mirror, your male genitals fully exposed, while your breasts looked even flatter than before.
Reaching for the lotion you sometimes use for your dry skin, you take a spritz, wonder how a boy would actually self pleasure himself and after a moment's hesitation, you slowly begin to stroke your penis.
Forty nine minutes later, you wipe your hands off, disappointed and conflicted that nothing happened and that your male genitals remained flaccid during the whole experience. Sitting up, you hug yourself as you look at your reflection, confusion flitting across your face as you attempt to sort out what's what.
An idea comes to mind as you remember something you caught your sister doing and standing, you fetch some of the scented candles you sometimes light.
Arranging them at a safe distance on several plates, you click on the overhead fan to its lowest setting, light the candles and taking a seat once again on the bean-bag chair, you look into the mirror, concentrating on your female aspects, ignoring as best as possible the fact that you have a penis and testicles.
Running a hand over your body, you trace the subtle curves that will one day make up your hourglass figure, run a hand over your flat stomach, breathe deeply the heady scent coming from the candles, close your eyes as the circulated air from the fan flows over your soft body and gently you reach with one hand to your breast and slowly began to message the nipple until it is erect and excited.
With your other hand, you run it over your leg a couple times, feeling more and more turned on by the scents and feeling, until you spread your legs and gently placing the hand betwixt your legs, you begin to message the skin until, after a couple seconds, you feel it become moist.
With the feeling of being sexually excited growing and growing, you moan softly and taking the first two fingers on your hand, you slip them into your vagina, the moan of pleasure growing longer and softer.
A knocking noise breaks the spell and struggling a bit, your fingers slipping out, you twist about and call out, "What? Who is it? What do you want?"
"Are you getting ready yet?" your mother's voice answered back. "We have to be at the restaurant in about an hour and a half."
Struggling a bit more, you blow out the candles and looking back at the mirror, you call out, "I was just about to hop into the shower," as you struggle to comprehend how it was that you were clearly Jilling off when you do not even have a vulva.
"Well, don't take too long," your mother announced. "Jackie also needs the use of the bathroom."
Collecting your towels and hygiene stuff, you huff in mild agitation as you flip off the fan and replied, "All right. All right. I am going now," and tying in place your robe, you exit your room, as your mother disappears down the hall.
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An hour later, feeling conflicted about having to wear a dress, you sit on the couch, adjusting the shoes Jackie loaned you, your mind still on the issue of whether you are indeed male or female. Inside your head, the voice you believe to be connected with your consciousness was still hollering that this was all wrong and you were indeed male, albeit in a quieter voice.
Standing, you adjust your tights, attempt to decide which is more comfortable, a bra and underwear or a one-piece underwear, and sitting back down, you cross your legs, suddenly hating that you have a penis and testicles.
Thinking, "I must be a girl," you stand and moving across the living room, tired of waiting, you head for the front hall to collect your coat, reasoning, "I walk like a girl. Talk like a girl. Think like a girl. Behave like a girl. Dress like a girl. I even pleasure myself like a girl," as you take your coat off the hanger.
A voice behind you called out, "Oh. You look so beautiful," and turning, you watch as your mother approached the front hall, smelling strongly of some of her favourite perfume.
Blushing, you respond, "Thank you," as you collect her coat and hand it to her.
Kissing you lightly on the cheek, your mother explained, "You should dress like this more often. It really brings out your eyes, hair and figure," as your father and Jackie joined you in the front hall.
Blushing even more, you pull on your coat and follow your older sister, mother and father out to the car, thinking, "I could get used to dressing like this more often." as you climb into the car, sure that the voice in your head was wrong and that you are indeed a girl, not a boy.