My whole body felt bruised and beaten all to hell, though there were no marks on my body. I struggled to recall how I managed to get into the yard, thinking the bizarre events of the night before to be some kind of strange dream.
Then I saw the sliding glass door that looked out onto my back yard, the glass shattered into a thousand shards, and hanging off it's track. I realized that I must have smashed my way through the door once I'd changed. I struggled to recall what had happened when I was the beast, but found little more than a headache for my troubles.
I walked gingerly into the house, praying it wasn't totally destroyed during my walk on the wild side, as well as hoping I didn't slice my feet to ribbons on the glass. When I went inside, I drew a sharp breath, as I wasn't expecting the scene of gore that lay inside.
Benny was strewn across my living room, mutilated horrifically. I began to cry, wishing I would've had more control over myself in my new form. Benny had been my constant companion since my (ex)husband and I had gotten him as a pup. Now he was gone, the first victim of my new condition.
I got a large garbage bag out of the kitchen , and did what I could to clean up his remnants, silently begging him for forgiveness and hoping there was a doggie heaven. It was a hard morning, to say the least.
The smell was the worst part, I'd have to say. I alternately wanted to gag on the stench one moment, and then wanted to taste the blood the next. I went through an entire bottle of ammonia on my living room, wanting to banish the scent completely.
I was so wrapped up in my cleaning efforts, I didn't really notice how heavy the fumes had gotten until I was nearly done.
I found myself quite short of breath, with my lungs burning. I needed to get out of the house for awhile, simply to breathe the clean air. Heading upstairs, I put on some clothes after thoroughly cleaning off my hands. (Yes, I was in such shock, I was cleaning the house naked. The mind works oddly in a crisis.)
I then headed out of the house, not really sure of where I should go.