Kyle brought his now pint sized pal Frank back to his apartment and sat him down in front of the cartoon network. "Now you just sit, tight, kid, and Uncle Kyle will figure out how to fix all this."
Little eight-year-old Frank's jaw dropped as a toy commercial rolled. It was hard to believe that just a few hours ago he'd been a thirty year old Italian stud.
Kyle went into the other room and shouted out loud. "Okay. I know you're watching. You think this is all hilarious . . . and . . ." He turned back and snuck a glance of the former hairy cassanova slouched down on his couch, feet dangling, grinny dopey boyish grin. "I guess it kinda is hilarious. But we can't just leave him that way. Your beef is with me, and you should turn Frank back to normal." He glanced around the empty dining room. "Okay?"
He heard the Leprechaun's laughter echo.
"Seriously. Enough is enough. You had your fun."
With a puff of green smoke, the funny little man reappeared on the dining room table. "You can never have too much fun, boyo!"
Kyle gestured to the boy in the other room. "But look at him, come on. He needs to grow up again. I'm not going to babysit my best friend."
"Oh, so you don't want to be responsible for him?" The Leprechaun tipped his green hat.
"Not really."
"Fine then!" The little man put his fingers to his lips and whistled long and shrill.
Frank perked up and came running into the room. "Hey look! A cool little man!"
"That's right, boyo! How'd you like to come with Mr. Leprechaun and perform all sorts of neat little chores?" The Leprechaun snapped his little figners and stable boy clothes appeared on frank. Boy's work boots, and overalls that slung loosley over his scrawny bare chest.
Frank smiled stupidly. "Oh boy! That sounds cool!"
"No, no, no, no!" Kyle stood between Frank and the Leprechaun. "You're not making my best friend your stable boy. It's humiliating enough you did it to me. Like I said, you want to mess with me, that's one thing. But let's keep other people out of it."
The Leprechaun grinned. "Big man, taking charge, huh?"
Kyle crossed his arms defiantly. "Yeah, that's right. Now come on. Let's skip the part where you make him do chores and just conjure up one of those magic beers that makes him a grown up again. Come on."
"Oh," the Leprechaun's eyes glinted. He took of his hat. "You mean one of these beers?" He pulled a frosty brown bottle out of his hat. The label read "Big Boy Brewskie!"
"Thank you," Kyle said. "Franky-Boy, we're gonna get you back to normal."
The Leprechaun popped the bottle open with a hiss of carbination. Kyle perked up at the smell of hops. "Why don't you give it to him, Kyle," The Leprechaun said. He handed Kyle the freezing cold bottle.
Kyle held it. His mouth watered. He recalled the beer he had chugged just this morning as a little boy. How wonderful it had felt going down his throat. How it had made him big and strong and manly again. He wanted that feeling again so badly. But he was already a grown up.
"What's the matter, Kyle." The Leprechaun snickered. "You don't want to give that beer to your little friend?"
"I can't drink beer, Uncle Kyle," Frank said. "I'm just a kid."
Kyle's hand moved the beer closer to his mouth, he sniffed the neck of the bottle. He was so thirsty.
"But your Uncle Kyle wants you to have a sip, isn't that right?" The Leprechaun teased. "Or does he want to keep all the grown up drinks for himself.
Kyle couldn't help himself. He tilted the bottle back and chugged. It was so tasty and refreshing as it gulped down his throat and settled in his stomach. His fingers tingled. His gut rumbled. Something was about to happen, but he wasn't sure what. He was already and adult, what could one more magic beer do to him?
Suddenly, he felt his body swelling. His belly swelled and pushed tight against his shirt. His butt pressed against his jeans. Sleeves constricted around his upper arms. His T-shirt was riding up on his expanding gut, exposing the hairy belly underneath. His arms were pudgy. His face swelled just a bit, becoming rounder. Everything felt softer and softer. Kyle's big round ball shaped gut thundered out a massive manly belch, twice as loud and powerful as the one he'd erupted that morning.
The Leprechaun rolled with laughter.
Kyle raced to the bathroom. The mirror reflected back a big bear of a middle-aged man. Late forties at least. His stomach protruded far over his waist. Distinguished gray streaks ran over his ears, wrinkles crinkled around his eyes as he examined himself in disbelief. The button of his khakis popped off and bounced into the sink. He rested his hand on his round, hairy beach ball shaped gut and slapped it in disbelief. His fat jiggled. He was an overweight middle-aged man.
Little Frank appeared in the bathroom doorway. "You okay, Uncle Kyle?"
Kyle sighed. He wasn't sure what to say.
The Leprechaun trotted in. "Oh, your Uncle Kyle's doing just fine, Franky Boy! He's just trying to process the fact that this morning the two of you were young studs pushing thirty, getting in shape. And now he's a pudgy forty-five year old blimp, and you're just a skinny wee boy. So much for all those morning workouts, eh?"
Frank giggled childishly, barely understanding what was happening. Kyle attempted to pull his shirt back down, but it just rode right back up over his middle aged gut.