"What the hell, man?" shouted the kid, doubling over as though punched in the groin. Jake didn't wait around for the kid to realise what had been done to him, instead turning on his heel and striding purposefully out onto the High Street.
He checked the time. Damn, he thought - still a good twelve hours to go before the watch would let him revise his comically small endowment. All he needed to do was steer away from any source of public embarassment...
"Hi hun."
Oh crap, he thought, turning to see the blonde hair and generous bustline of his girlfriend Katie. She was carrying two loads of Tiffany's bags and wearing sunglasses and a French Connection UK teeshirt stretched across her jiggling rack ("FCUK" had never looked so good, he thought). She was a few months older than Jake and from a much wealthier family, and he felt out of her league enough at the best of times. His baby-sized penis twitched in his loose boxers at the sight of her curvaceous figure and pretty face.
"Erm, hi Katie. What are you up to?"
"Just out shopping with the girls," for a moment Jake was sure she was talking about her breasts until he realised she meant her friends Liz and Sukie. "But they're trying on new dresses in Gotcha and frankly everything in there is just way too big for me. Now you're here, I have some new ideas how we could spend the rest of the afternoon..." She grabbed him by the arm, giggling.
In the end Jake settled for the new superhero movie, wincing slightly at the way the male lead filled out his lycra underoos. Katie sat beside him - at first she seemed happy to just watch the movie, but by half-time she was feeding him popcorn, running her fingers through his hair. As the romantic subplot reached its climax she leaned over, giving him an eyeful of her lightly freckled cleavage and slid her hand into his shorts. Jake tried to twist away but she cupped his genitals with one hand and nudged his shoulder, a concerned look on her face.
"It feels ... really small, Jake," she whispered, a look of almost hurt on her face. Jake was mortified.
"I haven't been well," he said, defensively.
"Really, really small," she reiterated, slowly and thoughtfully. "Is that normal for you?"
Jake didn't know what to say. Katie kept to herself for the rest of the movie, something that worried Jake more than her previous flirtatiousness. He looked at the watch - still eight hours left. He hoped it hadn't already cost him a relationship.