"I have given all women bodies that will please me based upon this modern pornography!"
You venture to ask, "Uh, by 'all women,' do you mean..."
"Yes, I mean all women!" proclaims the genie. "In my centuries of slumber, my powers have grown nearly infinite! I have made all women resemble those in this pornography! I have set the minimum breast size at -- I believe this is the correct measuring scale that you use -- 36D!"
You take a moment to contemplate that, but then there's a buzzing in your pants. You realize you'd forgotten about your phone as you were sucked into the genie lamp, but it seems to have survived the trip. You take your phone out of your pocket, and the display shows that you're getting a call from a college friend you haven't heard from in a while. "Hmm, Lena," you mutter.
"Who is Lena? One of your lovers?" asks the genie.
You ignore him as you answer the phone. "Hello?"
She sounds a bit out of breath. "Hey, I got through to someone!" she yells, apparently to someone else in the room. "Uh... w-who is this?"
You tell her, and she replies, "Oh, okay, I was just picking random contact numbers, hoping I could get through! We're not getting a dial tone on our office phones, and the Internet's jammed -- did it just happen where you are?"
"Did what just happen?" you ask, although you have a pretty good idea.
"Ah, you are communicating with a woman who has been improved!" exclaims the genie.
Because of the genie's loud voice, you miss the first few words of Lena's response. "-- all of a sudden changed! Even our clothes! What about at your office?"
"I don't know, I'm home," you answer.
"Oh, that's right, you're on the East Coast," says Lena, and then she suddenly gasps. "My supervisor Karen had a coat here -- she just put it on, and it shrank into a tiny little jacket!"
"Her coat shrank?" you ask, not sure you heard correctly.
"All part of my magic!" booms the genie. You glare at him.
"Is someone else with you?" asks Lena.
"It's a long story," you answer.
"Well, can you turn on the news or something? I mean, this is -- it must be widespread if we're having phone issues."
"Oh, uh, I'm a cord cutter, and I don't have an antenna yet, so --"
You stop, noticing the genie's hands are charged again. "This long-distance conversation has grown tiresome! I will bring your lover here!"
"She's not my lover," you protest, but the genie claps. You close your eyes briefly due to the flash, and you open them to see Lena standing in front of you, phone still up to her ear.
Her face hasn't changed too drastically, aside from the thick coating of porn-star makeup. But her dirty-blonde hair is now platinum and falls to her waist in waves, her breasts are about the size of overripe honeydew melons and her hips and ass have enlarged to match, her skin is a few shades darker and is missing the freckles that used to dot it, and she's wearing a skimpy blue minidress and matching platform heels, plus a bit too much jewelry.
From the expression on her face, it's obvious...