You smile in gargantuine stupidity and unzip your pants. You somehow needed to pee, and began to climb the statue. You eventually get to the mouth.
"Oh, you're gonna get fed alrigt, fuckwad," You mutter, and piss in the guys mouth, making you feel relief.
"HOLY SHIT! IS THAT ASPERAGUS?" A voice booms from inside the mouth.
"WHAT THE FUCK?" You yell, and topple off the statue, landing on your balls. You scream out in pain.
The statue begins to glow brightly...