Jeff took a place in the front row of the audience, glad to be out of the limelight, as Stephan beckoned him off the stage. The crowd shouted insults at him, but it died away as he blended in and looked like just another farmboy, albeit a farmboy who would never get any further through puberty. The smell of sweat, dirt and urine on the unwashed bodies of the audience still revolted him, but Jeff knew that he was in no position to complain.
A chorus of whistles and catcalls greeted the next item in the show. Madame Illusia had brought on a stunning young blonde woman on to the stage. The girl smiled seductively and bit her bottom lip as Stephan rose to speak.
“This is Melanie,” he announced. “Melanie is the four times winner of the south central beauty pageant, current crowned queen of the county parade and an experienced underwear model. Lets hear it for Melanie!”
The male-only crowd went wild again. As they cheered maniacally, Jeff suspected that their excitement was partly the work of the old lady. Although Jeff was mostly gay, and now lacking in the necessary baby-making equipment, he found to his horror that his mouth opened and his redneck voice joined in with the rest. Stephan gestured the crowd to quieten down.
“Melanie has done lots in her life, but needs a man to make her life complete. She has agreed to a contest to find out who is the most red-blooded stud in the room. She has asked for five volunteers to come up and kiss her. The man who does best will have shown himself worthy of her affections. The man who does best will be able to stay with Melanie forever. It will be Melanie’s choice to pick five men.”
Of course, with an invitation like this, the crowd were clambering over each other to get Melanie’s attention.
“What’ll happen to the other four?” came a lone voice from the audience, struggling to make himself heard over the frantic jostling for the front. Melanie just smiled sweetly at him.
“I’ll pick… that one,” she said, pointing at a well-built but wild-haired young man from the second row. “And… that one there and him and… those two.”
Soon all five men were standing on the stage facing the audience. The crowd of unpicked men booed, but calmed down when Stephan began to speak. They waited to see what would happen next.
“First of all, gentlemen, lets find out about you,” Stephan announced. “Tell this audience your name, how old you are and what job you do.”
The wild-haired young man was first to speak. The nerves were clear in his voice.
“Err… I’m Nate and I’m 22 and I work on Danson’s Farm with the horses and with the donkeys.”
Nate stood back, relieved his ordeal was over. The next men spoke.
“Hey there, I’m Billy and I’m 26 and I’m a truck driver.”
“My name’s Brandon, I’m a stable hand and I’m 24.”
“Hi, I’m Dan, I’m 20 and I work all over Hillman’s Ranch.”
“Me, my name is Tom, I’m a railroad engineer and I’m 25.”
“Thank you gentlemen,” said Stephan. “I’m sure you agree we’ve got five top specimens of manhood here on this stage tonight. Before I ask you to step over to Melanie, we need to get you ready.” He waved his hands in a complicated gesture. Immediately, the clothes of all five men disappeared. As they stood there, naked and blushing, the crowd let out an enormous cheer.
Stephan gestured Nate over to Melanie. Nate did indeed have a well-built chest and powerful arms and legs. He would have been the clear winner if he wasn't extremely nervous. His balls swung between his legs as he positioned his mouth close to Melanie's face, closed his eyes and plunged in. No style whatsoever, he missed her lips completely and ending up kissing her chin. By the time he had realised his mistake, Melanie had pushed him away and was waiting for Billy.
Billy was the oldest of the group but the shortest. A round-bellied dwarf with dark hair on his chest and body, he swaggered confidently
to Melanie. Some of the crowd giggled when they caught sight of the curly black hairs on Billy's back and shoulders. Grabbing hold of Melanie's neck, he launched in to her. She scowled as Billy's rough week-old stubble dug into her skin.
Brandon, his naked body revealing ingrained dirt from the hayshed, put his filthy hands around Melanie's head and guided her mouth towards his. She coiled back in shock as he opened his mouth, revealing his broken nicotine-stained teeth.
Dan's kiss was similarly unpleasant for Melanie. A thin boyish figure, he pecked her a few times on the cheek, before she pushed him away. Tom's kiss showed the benefit of more experience but was still cold and unexciting.
The five men had returned to their positions on the stage facing the audience.
"And now, gentleman, before Melanie announces her decision, we will make certain that our contestants do not escape." Stephan gestured to Madame Illusia, who waved her hands until the five young men were suddenly frozen in position. "Drum roll please. Are you ready to choose one of these five men, Melanie."
"Yes, I am. The winner is..."