Trevor frowned as he held the short straw. He didn't have any longer straws left to palm.
Kyle was holding the long straw. He knuckle walked over to the computer to emphasize his caveman status. He sat down at the computer and started typing.
"You should know that Neanderthals weren't stupid, naked apes, that was Homo Erectus," Kyle said speaking normally, "So yes, I can still speak, and I think hairy boy would make a great living loincloth."
"What?!!" said Trevor. He stood there getting thinner and thinner until he collapsed as a hairy swath of leather that reconfigured into a loin cloth. Kyle walked over and pulled Trevor up over his Neanderthal manhood.