It was a typical sort of peaceful town. Where nothing really out of the ordinary would happen. The kind people would either leave average, peaceful lives or leave when they were old enough to explore bigger and grander things. The kind of simple, happy place you don't often see in the huge hustle and bustle of giant cities, or even now in more updated suburbs. Quite honestly, the last place you'd expect for anything really strange or incredible to even happen.
All of a sudden two people come in with crowbars.
"This is a stick up!!" The first guy screamed, holding up his weapon menacingly.
"Just give us your money and no one gets hurt" threatened the second guy, narrowing his eyes.
This action might be seen as an issue... if the two fairly scrawny, goofy looking teenage boys weren't in the play ground Sunday afternoon of an abandoned elementary school, aiming their tools not at people, but rather at an empty swing set, before erupting into laughter.
"Man that was epic bro" said the first guy, smirking some to himself as he put the crowbar on the ground. "Seriously if that had been someone, we'd so have their coinage right now."
"No doubt about it dude" said the second guy, still imitating swinging the crowbar around. "Hopefully with enough cash so we could kick it to somewhere actually cool."
"Oh most def" said the first, rubbing his chin. "Maybe we could do that at the local McDonalds. That way we'd get the money, and get some grub on."
"Come on, aim a bit higher then that" said the second, gently hitting him with his crowbar. "At least like a... Red Robin's or something. They'se got to have a bigger vault of stuff in."
"Yeah but like there's more hot babes at McD" the first guy pointed to himself. "So thinking about it we could get the money, get some food and maybe even score at the same time."
"...Bro that is pretty wicked smart" admitted the second, still imitating poking around with his crowbar. "And if anyone tried getting in our way I'd be all wah, bah, shahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh" he then swung around in a circle, narrowing hitting guy one.
"Hey wigga watch it" warned the first as the second continued spinning, eventually chucking the crowbar a few dozen feet away, causing a rather large thud sound and a glow of energy. Guy one saw this and gasped, turning his friend around. "Dude check it out."
"Yeahhhhhh" the second guy said, sounding very satisfied. "I am the most wicked tosser ever."
The first guy smacked him in the head. "Not that bro, There's some mad wicked glow stuff over there."
"Oh shit, really?" The second then looked to see where the first was peering, seeing his crowbar had landed near some sort of still glowing object that after a few seconds stopped shimmering. The two rushed towards it, and after a few feet could tell it was some sort of plastic looking wand that had been hit by the crowbar. "Woah, that thing gave off a killer light show" said the second, stepping closer, peering at the wand. "What do you suppose it is?"
The first rubbed his chin again, trying to appear in deep thought. "Hmmmm" he snapped his fingers. "ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh" he turned to the first guy. "This is like some sort of super advance alien tech."
"Really?" the second asked. "Is that the kind of shit that like will give you super powers and shit?"
".... Not all aliens give you special powers bro."
"Well now you're just being racist man" the second said crossing his arms. "And not to people who deserve it like weebs and geeks, but to super space men."
"Whatever" the first guy looked around. "Point is this must of landed pretty recently."
"So?"
"So that means we're the ones who found it."
"So?"
"So that means if we take this in to like some super scientist geek, we could get even more coin then a Mickey D's."
"So?"
"....Hello? Money? Bitches? Leaves this town?"
"Oh sweet" the second leaned forward then back. "Whoa whoa whoa hold it bro. I read sometimes this super alien tech is like contagious and shit. We could like get... space diseases."
"Like what?"
"I don't know, moon... herpes?"
"Pfffft, you gotta actually score before you get something like that man."
"Uh yeah, like I have all the time."
"Well same here" the first said as they bro fist before turning back to the object. "Still there could be something in there but it's like that guy said with great power.... something something."
"Something what?"
"It means touch it you dweeb" the first guy said hitting his friend again.
"Hey you touch it bitcher" the second said. The two guys went back and forth hitting one another for a minute, before stopping and breathing a bit heavy.
"Man this is going nohwere... fast" admitted the first.
"Yeah... like your mom last night."
The first was about to hit his friend again, before he smirked some. "Pffft, the only reason you don't want to touch it is cause you're a pussy."
"... You call me what?"
"You heard me pussy" he pointed at him. "I dare you to go over and grab that alien wand, if you got the balls."
"Oh I got the balls" the second said, grabbing his sack. "I got like the balls for days. Sunday... Monday... Tuesday....Wednesday-"
"Stop puss balling out and do it then" demanded the first.
"Fine" the second said walking over. "But that means I get first share of bitches, I call it." He then reached over and touched the wand, which was shown to be a red and pink and about standard size. He then lifted it up in one hand triumphantly. "Whose the pussy now ya..." suddenly white glow surrounded his being as more energy surged around him.
"Bro!" the first said, showing some concern seeing the second guy disappear before his eyes.
The second meanwhile appeared to be in some sort of white void as he looked around confused. "Whoa what the fuck is this fuck?" he asked, desperatley trying to kick and run out. "Dude I swear I wasn't going to steal anything! I just talk the talk man, just talk the talk!"
"GREETINGS MORTAL HUMAN WHO HAS FOUND THIS WAND" called out an etherial voice, shocking the guy who looked around confused. "CHANCE IT SEEMS AHVE GIVEN YOU A CHOICE. THIS MESSAGE IS SPOKEN TO YOU IN THE SPACE BETWEEN MOMENT."
"...Space between spaces?" said a confused guy two. "Oh shit, is this like that Crystal Skull movie... wait that was a skull right? I'm sure wands do totally different things right?"
"SHOULD YOU CHOSE NOT TO CARRY THIS BURDEN" the voice continued it's automated message "THE WAND WILL VANISH AND APPEAR SOMEWHERE ELSE RANDOM IN THIS WORLD AND WAIT FOR ONE TO FIND IT."
"Wait choice?" the guy blinked a couple of times, narrowing some. "Ohhhhhhhhhh I get it. This is like some sort of game of worthiness or some shit right?" points at himself. "Cause I ain't no wippity whip man. That uh... thing you heard before was uh my test for you bro. Yeah I can take whatever you try dishing out at me man."
Suddenly images of the wand appeared in the white space as the second guy saw it in more detail as it's glow shot off a powerful rainbow of energy that illuminated the entire area. "THIS WAND MAY APPEAR TO BE A MERE CHILD'S TOY TO YOu, BUT IT IS IN FACT AND OBJECT OF GREAT AND TERRIBLE POWER."
"The... power to get me a lot of cash and bitches?" the second guy asked hopefully.
"YOUR FATE WILL BE TO RAISE AN ARMY TO PROTECT THIS WORLD FROM THE EVER GROWING SHADOW OF THE NETHER FIENDS. AND YES, WE DO MEAN 'FENDS" SUPERNATUAL ENTITIES AND PARASITES WHO SEEK TO CORRUPT AND USE AND MANIPULATE HUMANS AS THEIR PLAY THINGS AND FUEL, WHOSE POWER MAKES THEM UNABLE TO BE PERCIEVED BY NORMAL HUMANS WHO TREAT YOUR FACE AS CATTLE."
The second guy then yawned, stretching his arms. "Ughhh, what is this now history class? Seriously alien bro, you're boring as shit." he then tried pounding around in the white space desperatley. "There a way to get to the point here?" Eventually is pounding in a spot to the back of him caused the voice to start speaking a lot faster, as he noticed him holding his hand down in mid air was moving through the speech faster.
"NOTPOORMISHUERNSTOODPERSCUTEDPEOPLEWHOHAPPENEDTOHAVEHORNSANDWERENAMED'DEMONS'BYINSANEANDPARANOIDHUMANS-"
"Ahhh, now we're getting somewhere" the guy said continuing to pound the empty space. "Come on get to the good part."
"SHOULD YOU ACCEPT THIS FATE, YOU WILL BE MADE REGARDLESS OF WHAT YOU ARE NOW-"
"What I am now is too awesome to be made cooler" the guy said pounding again as the message skipped.
"IT IS INDEED A GREAT SACRIFICE."
"Pfft, yeah I'm awesome for showing how cool I am being here. Tell me something I don't know" the second guy once again skipped ahead of critical information presented.
"YOUR NEXT TASK WILL BE TO REALITY CHANGE YOUR SCHOOL OR WORKPLACE-"
"Whoa I get to change my shitty ass school? Cool I'm macking it out to the awesome then" the second guy said, again pounding to skip more of the message.
"THIS IS A TERRIBLE TASK, WE DO NOT PRETEND IT WILL NOT BE-"
"Ughhh this is must be like one of those notes where you have to sign your name five thousand fucking times after reading five boring ass pages. Weak sauce" he said pounding the space over and over again. "Dude I said yes man, just give it to me."
"WHO ARE YOU, WHO HAS FOUND THIS WAND AND HEARD THE MESSAGE AND ARE ABOUT TO MAKE THIS CHOICE?"
"Dude you're talking to the most awesome guy in the universe" guy two said pointing to himself. "And if that choice is uh.... I think I heard something about super powers and destroying the school, so yeah I'm all about that. Make it so bro."
"THEN THE CHOICE... HAS BEEN MADE" said the voice as the white space turned into a cosmic swirl as the guy starting spinning around. "PREPARE FOR MAGICAL GIRL TRANSFORMATION."
"... What the fuck did you just say?" Before the second guy had time to 'think' suddenly he found himself stripped naked as he gasped. "What? Hey I didn't agree to be space raped.. unless there's some fine ass bitch doing it." he found himself slimming down some as his frame become much more lilth and smoother, the small amount of hair on his face and even package disappearing. The skeletal and muscular structure were rearranged entirely as the second guy screamed out desparatley, not noticing his voice also changing to sound more cute and perky. As most parts of his body started to shrink, he noticed his rear end and hips start expanding and becoming much more pronounced, as his chest began feeling heavy. Soon he noticed he had grown breasts, that started out as A cups expanding outward to more of a D. "Whoa... boobs" the second guy said entirely transfixed and touching his new rack, too entranced to notice his genital at this point had disappeared and were replace with a uterus and shaved vagina. As he was now she, what was guy two started glowing as clothing soon formed on him. Instead of his baggy jeans, t-shirt and slacks though he was now sporting a yellow body snugging corset; white and pink puffy mini dress with at least four layers of pettitcoats and padding; swan white colored oprea length gloves with various rings now on her fingers; a yellow ballerina tutu around the skits that seemed to stick in place around her body; sparkling white pantyhose; and spiked light yellow boots with ribbons on the end of them. The wand had become a much larger scepter glowing with rainbow energy as her now long brightly blond colored hair had a regal bright yellow crown on her head. Her eyes were now far wider and bright blue with a smile on her face as if on instinct she struck a pose, extending out the wand as if ready for a might.
And with that, the world of cosmic swirls ended as we were back in the school, as the light in front of guy one died down that was knocking him back. Now free to move forward he rushed up. "Bro Bro you in there bro!" he asked rushing, suddenly stopping in his tracks at the magical blue eyed, blonde girl in front of him.
The wand sparkeled some around what was guy two who laughed some, spinning the wand before imitating a slice. "Nether Fiends beware!" she called out, before pointing to the sky. "For wherever you try and do wrong, Deena Happy will be there to stop you" she then made a peace sound around her eye, winking some.
Guy one looked a bit agape at this before quickly shaking his head. "Look you're real hot and stuff but seriously this weird light wand stole my friend and I need to get him back."
"Glad to hear you care dude" Deena said pointing at herself. "But I wasn't stolen, just changed and given a new purpose"
"Uh.... what?" Guy One said.
Deena pointed at the wand. "That wand we found and I touched told me it's grand purpose and I agreed to transform to fight these super demons who are trying to destroy the world" she crossed her arms. "Well my former self actually didn't have the attention span thankfully to listen to the whole spiel and just agreed so thankfully I could come into being to gain the power to save everyone."
".... Wha....?"
Deena rolled her eyes. "Dude I caught you spanking it to Magic Space Brownies like at least three times. You should know these kind of stories."
"Hey I only got into the story during that awesome Dark Lunar Arc Where Renny became Blacker Lady to...." guy one gasped. "Hey, no one's suppose to know about that! Except...." he gasped. "Is... is that really you man?"
"Well was man" Deena said pointing at her crotch. "Looks like you did call not getting balls, though not in the way you were expecting it to go."
"Yeah...." Guy one said his eyes bugging out.
"...You aren't going to faint out on me, are you?"
"Uh... no of... course not."
"Good, cause we got things to do." Deena then put her hands on her hips. "I didn't just get transformed to stand around and be hot eye candy. This magical girl contract exists for a reason you know."
"... Uh can part of it at least involve being hot eye candy?"
"Yeah for me alone when I total get to explore this sexy sexy body" Deena then started gently rubbing her hips and outfit. "Seriously when I get done with the set up, I'm finding some time for some wah, bah, shahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh if you know what I mean."
"Hmmm yeah you are defintley my bro in there" first guy admitted, before shaking his head. "Though wait, what exactly are you setting up?"
"Look I may be awesomely wicked magical girl, but these nether demons aren't a threat I can take down alone" Deena then held her staff protectively. "It will only be a matter of time before they find me and we begin our epic battle that will determine the fate of humanity. And I'm going to need like a legion of magical girl helpers and a special base to combat this threat."
"Uh, is one of those special bases going to fall from the sky then with the wand?"
"No, I gotta make it" Deena spun her wand around, elevating both herself and the first guy into the sky as she pointed over at the nearby high school a couple of blocks away. "And I know just what I'm making it form."
"Woah, you're going to trash the school?"
"Technically "reform" but yeah totally going to trash" she said with a wicked grin. "Just because I'm a magic girl protector don't mean I stop being the awesome I was before."
Guy one chuckled. "It does if you weren't awesome before" he bellowed out.
Deena rolled her eyes. "You know I could fucking drop you if I wanted right?"
Guy one stopped laughing. "Hey... you wouldn't do that."
"Don't worry, once you transform you'll be able to survive a 30 foot drop" Deena said pointing her wand out. "Then we can go over and-"
"Whoa whoa whoa whoa!" Guy one said shaking his hands. "Dude I don't want to be a chick!"
"Not even a super kick ass chick with magic powers!"
"What if I was a super kick ass dick with magic powers?" guy one asked, flexing his muscles. "Seriously man, transform me into a super human."
"Super Human? "Deena blinked. "Oh you mean like those guys in that Super Human show where they glow green and transform and grow spikey hair and scream for five minutes powering up before attacking wave after wave of stronger alien enemies?"
"Yeah that show was fucking awesome man. Especially when James died protecting the world from the alien disc and his son Rupert came in."
"Yeah that's not how this works" Deena pointed out. "You don't get to pick and choose who you transform into. The wand only makes magical girls."
"But aren't there always like... magical guys in magical girl things. Doesn't the wand have that as well?"
Deena looked at carefully. "Hmmm there may be something for that but that depends."
"Depends on what?"
Deena allowed the knowledge of the threat and of the message to pool all around Her Mind before laying out the options and which one she will choose.