You rub the lamp, not really expecting anything to happen. That stuff only happens in fairy tales. Suddenly a puff of purple smoke burst from out of the lamp. It floats in front of you for a moment then shifts and starts to take shape. In a couple seconds there stands before you a light brown, 6 foot tall, anthropomorphic rabbit, wearing nothing but a pair of pants. A rabbit that also looks like he's ready for the Mr. Olympia contest.
He looks down at you and grins. "Hey, thanks, bub, your the first person to rub that lamp in 20 years. It was gettin' kind of stuff in there."
You stare at the rabbit, your mouth wide open. He chuckles and lightly presses it close with his finger. "Better be careful there, pal, no telling what may fly in there.
Finally getting your voice back you stammer, "You're....you're..."
The genie nods. "Yep, I'm a genie. And I'm a rabbit. And don't give me that light brown hare gag. I've already heard it. A. Million. Times." He glares at you for a moment, making sure you understand how unhappy he would be if you did try that joke. The whole thing is just too weird for you but you manage to nod.
He breaks into a smile again. Gesturing, a lit cigar pops into his fingers. "Care for one, sport?" You barely manage to shake your head no. He nods and takes a long puff. "Smart move. Bad for your health and all that, but that's cause you're mortal. Me, I'm a genie, and I've got a lock on that immortality bit."
It's finally getting to be all to much for you. You start to slump to your knees but before you can hit the ground the genie has a paw under both your arms. "Hey, pal, take it easy. Come on, sit down on the bench here. Sheesh, I keep forgetting how your mortals can't handle this magic bit." He gestures again and this time a glass of water pops into his paw. He holds it up to your lips. After several sips and a couple of deep breaths you manage to calm down some.
"You really are a genie?" you finally manage to ask.
Rolling his eyes and giving an exasperated sigh, the genie nods. "I keep forgetting how long it takes to sink in with you folks, too. Yep, I am a genie and I do grant wishes, but only..."
Before he can finish you jump up from the bench. "I wish for an infinite number of wishes and then I wish for a billion dollars!" you shout.
The genie rabbit sighs again and shakes his head. "Doesn't work that way, pal. Those kind of genies are few and far between. Too much trouble. Guys like me, especially us anthro genies, we can only grant animal wishes. You want to turn yourself into an animal, can do. You want to turn someone else into an animal, can do. Got it?"
Your elation deflates faster than a busted ballon. Sitting back on bench you think for a moment. "Hey, if I can't wish for stuff, how can you pull cigars and glasses of water from thin air?"
"Personal comforts for me I can do, too. But nothing says I can't hand 'em to someone."
"Then how come you can't give yourself a billion dollars and hand it to me? That sounds like a real good personal comfort."
"Rules, kid. This stuff goes back millenia. If it was up to me I would, but it ain't, so I can't."
You let out a heavy sigh and lean back on the bench in a deep funk. The rabbit genie pats your shoulder. "Hey, don't be so down, pal. Being an animal can be *a lot* of fun. Take it from a rabbit," he says, giving you a sly wink.
You sigh again. Ok, so maybe it won't be so bad. What've you got to lose?