"I'M HUNGRY!"
Kim's loud, jarring voice rang through the caravan. Three days with only scraps to eat had driven her a bit mad, and her incessant whining was driving her partners even madder.
"Would ye shut up back there, lass?" Jamie called from the front. "You don't be the only one who's starving in this caravan!" He was busy piloting the caravan as they plodded along towards Phandalin.
"But I want food..." Kim's purple locks hung down from the seat she was sitting upside down in. "I've been wasting away for three days and I'm going to die and nobody will remember me..."
"Please." Jennifer, the wizard who was accompanying them, spoke up. "Your continuous complaining is blocking my concentration. I am trying to visualize the path ahead, and if you continue to block my aura, and we happen to come across a spot of trouble, then you may well never eat for the rest of time."
"You're all no fun!" She pulled her goggles up from her eyes. "Every day I travel with you, it's all about precaution and planning! You never do anything because you want to, you just want to make money!" She flipped up from her chair. "Not me! I want adventure! I want love and romance! I want..."
Her eyes went wide. "Food!"
"Ye been banging on about wanting food for days now!" Jamie cried.
"Stop the caravan! Actual food!"
The horses grinded to a halt. Kim rushed out of the caravan and to a nearby tree. "Look at them! Apples! Massive! Beautiful!"
Jennifer looked at the apples. Apples was certainly the word for what they were, but they weren't like any apples she'd ever seen. They were bulbous and purple, and had a faint stench of... aura?
'Kim, stop." Kim held 5 apples in her hand as Jennifer spoke.
"I can't stop! Need food!"
"No, you need to put down those fruits right now. They're enchanted."
Kim laughed. "You're trying to take them all for yourself! Not working with me, buddy!"
"KIM! GET DOWN FROM THERE!" Jamie screamed at her as he approached the tree, axe in hand. "I've seen a mate try apples like those before, and the results weren't pretty! You better come down right now!"
"But..." Kim's face drooped. "I'm hungry."
She let the apples fall to the forest floor, then dropped herself, landing perfectly with her thief skills. She tied her bandana around her head, and said: "Fine, have it your way. Let's get out of here."
As she reentered the caravan, she felt her aura-proof purse for the apple she had pilfered.
---
Kim checked her two partners, sound asleep. Smiling, she pulled out the apple she had concealed.
"It's been a long day without you, food."
As she took the first bite, the juices ran down her face. It was a hard to describe flavor, almost like grape and mango and starfruit. She didn't care about the flavor, she just wanted food!
As she chomped through a second bite, and half of the apple, a "Whuh?" caught her off guard. She had been caught.
"You are a complete and total idiot."
Kim reached for her apple as it flew into Jennifer's hands. "Do you know how much danger you have put us in? How did you know that apple wasn't enchanted with a fireball spell? You could have burned us all to death!"
"Well," Kim retorted, sneering her nose, "I did know one thing, and I still know one thing, and that thing is that that apple is food, and YOU NEED TO GIVE IT BACK NOW!"
"Hrrm, whozat...?" Jamie's beard was wild and uncombed, but his anger shone through clearly when he saw the situation. "So! Ya couldn't handle goin' wittout stuffin' yerself for twelve seconds!"
"No!" Kim yelled back "And I'm quite pleased with my choice!"
Jennifer sighed. "Kim, if you keep up your reckless behavior, you will get into trouble that you won't get yourself out of."
"I'm a thief, Jennifer, getting out of trouble is literally my job."
"Howabout you two shuttup and go to bed, and we'll clean up Kim's dead body in the morning?" Jamie cursed and buried his head in his sleeping bag.
Jennifer and Kim gave eachother a nasty look and followed suit.
---
Kim awoke the next morning afresh. Just two bites of that apple had given her an amazing nights sleep! She sprung out of bed, tied her bandana, donned her goggles, and knotted her ponytail.
"How about that? Kim! She ate a fruit... and didn't explode!" She clasped her hands to her face in fake surprise, then laughed.
"Shuttup, and stop acting like you weren't being reckle..." Jamie gaped at Kim. "Oh my."
Jennifer peeked at her through a hole in the tent. A wide, toothy grin spread across her face, and she burst into bouts of laughter.
"Err, Kim, dearie, ye..." Jamie grimaced and swallowed. "Ye have, uhh..."