You tell Stephen everything: About bringing Keith to a college open house, about making Keith's clothes disappear and turning him into a dog. Then the unfortunate events of turning Keith into a pile of dog crap and a cop into a Tupperware container. You pull in front of Stephen's destinations just as you finish your tale.
Stephen gives you a look, and then laughs. "Wow, dude, that is just hilarious. Have you been getting into some abstract comedy stories since high school, because you have a talent for it."
"Ur...no, I haven't, so...can you help me?"
"Hey, has been great to see you, thanks for giving me a ride in your awesome car, but I better get going here. Catch me on Facebook and you can tell me more."
"Stephen, wait, you're my only hope."
"Sure thing, Princess Leia," he says, rolling his eyes as he reaches for his door handle.
You take your keys from the ignition. "Wait, Steve, just take a look and..." You accidentally hit a button on the keys, and suddenly Stephen is obscured by a bright light. When the light clears, there is a white toilet sitting in the seat besides you. The lid moves and you can hear Stephen's voice. "Huh. That's weird, I can't seem to reach the handle. Actually, I just feel sorta weird in general. Like...I dunno how to describe it." The toilet's tank rattles a bit.
"Ur...do you feel...urm...flushed?"
"Not exactly. Hard to describe."
You reach over and pull down the passenger side visor, revealing the mirror. "Can you see yourself in the mirror, Steve?"
"Huh? Oh, yeah. Is that a toilet? How..." The toilet pauses, and the lid moves as you can hear Stephen quietly mouthing "What the hell?" Then he yells, "Is that me?! What happened?"
"I told you. I have these magical car keys that change reality and..."
"So you turned me into a toilet? Fix this right now!"
"Well, you were going to leave and...yeah, I'll try and fix this. One moment. Ur...might if we get out of the car?"
"What?! No, I don't want to have anyone see me like this!"
"Well, it's a new car and..."
The toilet gives a sputtering growl.
"Good point."